What TikTok’s Reesa Teesa, 48 Oysters on a First Date and A First Date at The Cheesecake Factory Have in Common With My ‘Novel Destination Wedding’

GIVEAWAY Included In This Post!!!

Hello World,

Speaking of single black females, about a week ago, I watched the 50-something part viral TikTok series Who TF Did I Marry? over a two-day period. It was just that engaging. There were several things about the series that drew me into the drama. It mostly took place in metro Atlanta, Clayton County to be exact, where I lived for several years. Hilariously, Reesa Teesa referred to her lying ex-husband by the moniker Legion, which refers to being possessed by several demons in the Bible. She is a Christian and admitted that in hindsight, the Lord told her Legion was not her husband on her first date although she ignored the guidance she received on that first date. If you’re unfamiliar with this Reesa Teesa story, here’s an “An Extremely Thorough Guide to ‘Who TF Did I Marry’” by Danielle Cohen for The Cut.

Last week, a woman posting under the name Reesa Teesa started a 52-part TikTok yarn about her marriage to a man she called “a real pathological liar” and also “the United Nations of red flags.” Over the course of several days, she posted dozens of ten-minute videos unraveling how she ended up dating, marrying, and eventually divorcing a guy she claims lied about pretty much everything in his personal life. According to her account, the man — whom she’s calling Legion — relied on a convoluted network of fake phone calls, unverified paperwork, and pandemic-era logistical chaos to keep up his many charades.

But “Who TF Did I Marry?” is so much more than that — it is a prestige-television masterpiece, a chart-topping soap opera, a modern epic involving condiment HQ bureaucracy and two real-estate agents named Scott. (One of them may or may not be real.) To be clear, no one seems to have corroborated this woman’s story, so she is either a wildly good storyteller or a great candidate for the Nobel Prize in fiction. No matter; thousands of people have apparently taken ten hours of their precious lives to tune into her saga. Here is a drastically abbreviated version of what she claims happened. Strap in.

According to her videos, Reesa matched with this man on two different platforms, Facebook Dating and Hinge, though he apparently had used his full name on one and his nickname and different photos on another. (In retrospect, the first of many ominous signs.) Throughout the thread, she refers to him as Legion — as in the biblical man possessed by demons — which she says is the same name she uses to talk about him with people in her life these days. Because we are all now intimately acquainted with Teesa, we will be using that name here too.

To read the rest, click HERE. 

So after digesting this series, I thought back about two other TikTok viral sensations from a few months back:

Have y’all heard about the woman who refused to get out of the car on a first date because her date took her to The Cheesecake Factory? If not, check out this article about it HERE.  Or what about the woman who ate 48 oysters on first date and had to foot the bill after her date left without her realizing it? If not, check out that article about it HERE.

What do all three of these viral dating stories have in common with my first novel Destination Wedding? All four are about dating in Atlanta, which can be treacherous…And that, in part, is why I wrote Destination Wedding…See the synopsis below…

Three successful best friends in Atlanta believe they are thriving in the Black Mecca. Bossy bank executive Senalda breaks down men from business to bed no holds barred. Hip hop PR guru Jarena praises the Lord and pursues married men with equal persistence. Famous and infamous radio personality Mimi fights with her fans and for the love of her on-and-off-again boyfriend.

But when an ABC News Nightline report, “Single, Black, Female — and Plenty of Company,” asks why can’t a successful black woman find a man? The friends are suddenly hyper-aware of their inclusion in the sad statistic: 42% of black women who have never been married. Like the women in the report, they are career-driven, beautiful black women living in Atlanta who have everything — but a mate. They resolve to defy the statistic by marrying in a year and have it all by tackling their goal as a project with a vision board, monthly meetings, and more. Project Destination Wedding is born. A “happily married” best friend Whitney is a project consultant.

But as the deadline ticks closer, the women wonder if they can withstand another year of looking for love in the media-proclaimed no-man’s land of Atlanta. Senalda wrests a marriage proposal from the male version of herself, but the proposal comes simultaneously with a devastating secret. Jarena unleashes hell when her call to ministry coincides with dating her married college sweetheart. Mimi faces losing her career and jail time chasing her boyfriend and marries another man in the process. Whitney’s power couple profile plummets when her husband, a pornography addict, announces he would rather pursue photography than be an MD.

Inspired by an actual Nightline report, Destination Wedding charts four women’s journeys as they discover that love is not an experiment easily confined to a timetable.

I know that Destination Wedding is fiction, but trust and believe real-life stories are woven into the words…Here’s one reviewer’s opinion about Destination Wedding:

I can’t believe this is the author’s first book! The characters were well developed and she clearly did her research on mental health, sex addiction, marital statistics of black women, and Atlanta culture. Hoping to see it on Lifetime or BET as a movie!

If you’re interested in reading Destination Wedding, I will send a free copy to you if you name the city in Clayton County where Reesa Teesa lived with her ex-husband Legion. Reply to this post, and I will email you to get your mailing address.

Any thoughts?

 

 

 

Pastor of Bright Morning Star Missionary Baptist Church in Louisiana Shoots His Wife & Himself in Hotel After Posting Happy Message on Facebook…

Hello World,

I’m not sure who said “Believe half of what you see and nothing of what you hear,” but I believe this quote is particularly applicable when it comes to social media! And I need to remind myself of this when I’m scrolling through Facebook and comparing myself unfavorably to others. Despite those who may have compared themselves unfavorably to 25-year-old Danny Prenell Jr., who is pastor of Bright Morning Star Missionary Baptist Church in Louisiana, and traveled to Mississippi alongside his wife, 27-year-old Gabrielle Prenell and their three children, he is clearly a hot mess of a man…

Various new outlets are reporting that after posting this inspirational message below, Pastor Prenell shot his wife before shooting himself…

Earlier in the month, Pastor Prenell hosted a church revival…

And in this post, he highlighted the fact that he is young to be a pastor of a church…

These posts may be very true, but obviously, they don’t reveal everything of what is going on that he didn’t post on social media. At the very hotel where he posted his last update, Hampton Inn & Suites McComb in Mississippi, is where the shooting occurred. The Prenells were taken to University of Mississippi Medical Center, but their condition has not been revealed. However, their children, who I believe were unharmed (Thank God!) are now in CPS custody. I hope their church family is lifting up the entire family in prayer because they need it.

Any thoughts?

P.S. And what is up with the husband-wife joint Facebook page? I wonder what is the rationale behind that…

Seven Things Da’Naia Jackson, Wife of YouTube Relationship Influencer Derrick Jaxn, Should Be Doing Other Than Charging for Her High-Priced H.E.A.L.E.D: Infidelity Recovery Bootcamp…

Hello World,

Although I quietly followed the relationship saga of disgraced YouTube relationship influencer Derrick Jaxn and his wife Da’Naia Jackson, I had very little to say on the situation because I felt compassion for new Christian Da’Naia Jackson. In my early days as a Christian, I probably appeared to be crazy too when it came to some of the choices I made in my love life and how I thought I heard from God. Thankfully, I did not get married during that time period nor make any relationship decisions that I couldn’t undo because the results would have likely been disastrous…

If you’re unfamiliar with what transpired between the Jacksons, please catch yourself up by reading this summary by Madame Noire writer Shannon Dawson…

In 2021, Jackson was dragged into the court of public opinion when her ex-husband Derrick Jaxn confessed to cheating in a cringey YouTube video.  Jackson donned a black bonnet and timid expression, holding her former husband’s hand as he admitted to his infidelity.

At the time, the devout Christian said she had “made peace” with the famed relationship coach’s creepin’ and that they were working to rebuild their marriage. But things eventually turned sour between the pair.

After four years of marriage, in December 2022, Jaxn filed for divorce from Da’Naia. But shortly after the split, social media users couldn’t help but notice the shy and submissive influencers glow up online.

Read the rest of the article “Da’Naia Jackson Riding The Wave Of Newfound Fame With Costly Infidelity Bootcamp” HERE.

After reading this article and learning about her H.E.A.L.E.D: Infidelity Recovery Bootcamp, which costs $990 at the base level and up to $4997 for one-on-one coaching, I felt compelled to add my commentary. Last month, she was interviewed by Laterras R. Whitfield on his Dear Future Wifey Podcast and the two-episode interview went viral. I listened to both episodes and I was encouraged by how composed she seemed after seeming so unhinged before. But after learning about this bootcamp, I find myself doubting where she says she is versus where she actually is in her healing journey. So as her big sister in Christ, I am writing this commentary hoping that she will see it. And I hope other women who may be in a similar situation will see it and take note as well. So below is my “Seven Things Da’Naia Jackson, Wife of YouTube Relationship Influencer Derrick Jaxn, Should Be Doing Other Than Charging for Her High-Priced H.E.A.L.E.D: Infidelity Recovery Bootcamp…”

1. Get Properly Divorced. While it is stated in the Madame Noire article that Derrick Jaxn is Da’Naia’s ex-husband. In the Dear Future Wifey Podcast, she said that the two are still married although he reportedly filed for divorce last year. Please see what she said at 1:26:30 in part two of the interview. Unless they are actively working through their issues in their marriage, I wonder why they are still legally married. And if they have chosen to stay married, is choosing to stay married in the wake of infidelity covered in the infidelity recovery bootcamp?

2. Go Inward Not Outward. I appreciate that Da’Naia is experiencing a “glow-up” after appearing in a bonnet alongside her husband in a video in which he detailed his infidelity. However, a glow-up is not necessarily indicative of being grown-up. I  can attest that some of my best growing up took place while I was wearing my own bonnet. I cannot tell you how many times I have prayed and cried, journaled, read, etc. while wearing a bonnet in the privacy of my home.  And the end result has been a woman who not only looks good on the outside but feels good on the inside. I never watched Derrick Jaxn’s videos until he was exposed by Tasha K, but within a few minutes of watching a video or two, I could tell that this was not a man who should be doling out relationship advice. Discernment is not something you can put on. It comes after spending time with God.

3. Fast From Social Media. This is more like 2.5, but since social media is a world in and of itself, it deserves it’s own numeral. These social media streets can be dangerous and deceptive.  Social media is how Derrick Jaxn was able to build a relationship empire while he was all the while cheating on his wife. I’ve noticed that Da’Naia has posted herself several times in new clothes, makeup, etc. on Instagram since the divorce announcement.  I have to wonder if she trying to prove something via social media. Is she trying to prove to Derrick that she can still look good despite all that he has done? If so, I understand. However, as I noted in number 2, healing comes from the inside, not the outside. But social media encourages validation from outward sources, sometimes to our own detriment. To counteract that, sometimes we have to fast from social media.

4. Allow Yourself To Be Tested. I love me some chocolate and other sugary treats! But I have worked very hard to not succumb to my worst impulses that will have me overweight and unhappy. One of the ways that I knew that I had received healing in this area is that I can be around some of my former favorite sugary treats and not even been tempted by them. I can see how some women including Da’Naia were attracted to Derrick Jaxn as a chocolate man. She noted in her recent podcast interview that even before they were married, she knew she was one of several women that he was sexing! While she may be working to get over the hold he had on her, what is she going to do when the next hunk of chocolate comes at her? When you are no longer tempted by a certain man or men like him, you know you have been healed. She said in the podcast interview that she is not dating, which is good since she is still married. However, when the time is right, she needs to see if the same type of man is tempting to her. If he is, she still has work to do.

5. Get Healing For Your Father Wounds.  Da’Naia also noted in the podcast interview that her relationship with her father influenced her relationship choices. I think that is a wise conclusion. So much of who we are comes from our relationships with our parents.  However, given the timing of her relationship as recounted online, I have to wonder if truly enough time has passed by for these deep-rooted issues to be healed. I have to take this time to recommend Overcoming Father Wounds: Exchanging Your Pain for God’s Perfect Love by Kia Stephens as a resource for those who may be experiencing hurt as a result of father wounds. While my relationship with my father is an affirming one, I believe that God has gifted Kia with a ministry for people who have experienced challenges in their relationships with their fathers.

6. Make Sure Your Children Are Good In Their Relationship With Their Father. Sadly, if Derrick would do this to Da’Naia, the mother of his children, I have to doubt that his relationship with their children as their father will not be unscathed…Hopefully, they will not suffer in the same way as their mother did in her relationship with her father…

7. Just Wait. As I noted previously, healing takes time. Nary six months have passed since the divorce announcement and now Da’Naia has been healed?! She also noted in the podcast interview that she worked behind the scenes in her husband’s business although many of his followers didn’t know he was even married! It’s clear that Derrick has her to thank for much of his success. She is intelligent and is very savvy at social media strategy, so much so that these high-behind prices she is charging for her H.E.A.L.E.D: Infidelity Recovery Bootcamp almost makes it seem like a scam. In fact, some are wondering if her husband is behind it all and the two are in cahoots…I doubt it, but stranger things have happened. How do she prevent this scrutiny? Wait. As the Bible says, there is a season for everything under the sun. Maybe her infidelity recovery bootcamp (and teachers do rightly receive additional scrutiny as noted in the word)  will be healing to some women in similar situations, but is NOW the time to launch them? I say, “No.”

So that’s all I have for now…

Any thoughts?

P.S. Do y’all know that Derrick Jaxn got the nerve to still be doling out relationship advice…He has a course going on TA-DAY!!! It’s called Secrets to Making an EVOLVED Man Crave You! How he know? You stoopid if you sign up for this…