Three Reasons Why the ‘Baby Daddy’ Card at Target Does Not Offend Me – A Father’s Day Post…

Who that is?
That’s just my baby daddy
Who that is?
That’s just my baby daddy
Who that is?
That’s just my baby daddy
Who that is?
That’s just my baby daddy…

Hello World,

I remember when this song “My Baby Daddy” song came out over 20 years ago in 1997! Time flies. Time flies. I couldn’t believe it when I heard the lyrics to this song (as written above) blare from the radio. A dysfunction put to music. And at the same time the delivery of B-Rock & The Bizz was so hilarious I had no choice but to be entertained. In the song, a woman presumably tells her new man that the dude hanging around aine nobody, that’s just my baby daddy. In other words, we hooked up and produced a child sans marriage and the only relationship we have at this point is for the sake of our son or daughter. As distasteful as the message of the song was, I knew of many women who had baby daddies. The song was created because of real life circumstances which were true then and still are as of today unfortunately.

When this term was created, it was only cloistered within the confines black community but just like much of black culture, its appeal spread to the masses. I’ve heard people of all races refer to the term and we all know what it means. And the term baby mama was added to the mix as well. Remember Tina Fey’s 2008 movie “Baby Mama?” But we won’t go off on that tangent since Mother’s Day already gets most of the love and today is Father’s Day.

All that to say, why is Takeisha Saunders of Texas getting all indignant about a “Baby Daddy” card she spotted in Target on Facebook. Her post about the matter went viral. See a snippet below…

 

I mean I understand her indignation to some degree, but her anger is directed toward the wrong target figuratively and literally. So below are three reasons why Takeisha needs to take her anger and direct toward another target…

1.Target didn’t create this term which has been a popular term for at least 20 years at this point. Within many communities, having a “baby daddy” is what it is and this card would apropos to least acknowledge that fact. Who are we to judge if a woman wants to refer to the man who is the father of her children as a “baby daddy?” With my worldview, I do believe that within a stable marriage is the best environment in which a child could be conceived, but I know that ideals are not always actualized.

2. For some people, “baby daddy” is a term of endearment. I’ve heard women, married and unmarried, and of various races, refer to the father of their children as their “baby daddy.” Yes, I know for many this term refers to a pathology but for some, this term puts a fun spin on paternity. You know when you’re shopping in the card aisle and you can choose a funny or serious card to commemorate an occasion. For some, this is just one of those comical choices. Erethang aine for erebody. Choose accordingly. It is up to you. Takeisha should have just moved on to the next card in my opinion or reframed her response to what she saw.  Like I was indignant when I saw Steve Harvey’s new bacon line in Publix and posted about it on Facebook. I appreciate the man’s humor but his humor does not translate in him getting my bacon for his bacon. LOL. You can’t be a comedian, radio show host, talk show host, game show host, author, marriage counselor and bacon maker (although this translates into  major bacon for him) in my world. I must draw the line somewhere and that would be at pork at Publix, but I digress…LOL…

3. Father’s Day is barely recognized as it is. There I said it. Mother’s Day is heralded from here to heaven and back but Father’s Day is decidedly dimmer. Diamonds is an appropriate gift on Mother’s Day but some Dockers on sale at Target is acceptable for Father’s Day. They will take what they get. Why not have more options to take notice of a day that for some is pretty tricky?

Bottom line: Target’s “Baby Daddy” card choice is a reflection of the choices that some people have made. I don’t think Target should have pulled the “baby daddy” card for that reason. Takeisha, I understand where you’re coming from, but in the end God is the final and only judge who matters.

And just for comical relief, take in this video please! The Tricky Lake show, LOL

Is the “Baby Daddy” card at Target offensive to you?

Happy Father’s Day!

 

 

New Book ‘Sex and the City and Us’ Celebrates 20th Anniversary of the Debut of ‘Sex and the City!’

Hello World,

Do you know what today is? It’s their anniversary…the 20th anniversary of the debut of the now iconic television show Sex and the City…yes, when we first met Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda and Samantha! My love for the show has been documented in many posts on this blog since the show debuted on HBO Jun 6, 1998! And on today, its 20th anniversary, I must again pay homage to the show that was referred to as a “personal love letter to single women everywhere” and certainly helped me navigate my singlehood days…

Me on Carrie’s stoop when I visited NYC back in 2009!

As it turns out, I’m not the only one who wants to pay homage to the institution that was Sex and the City, journalist and author Jennifer Keishin Armstrong is also doing so in her new book Sex and the City and Us: How Four Single Women Changed the Way We Think, Live, and Love.”

By the bestselling author of Seinfeldia, a fascinating retrospective of the iconic and award-winning television series, Sex and the City, to coincide with the show’s twentieth anniversary.

When Candace Bushnell started writing her “Sex and the City” column for the New York Observer, she didn’t think anyone beyond the Upper East Side would care about her adventures among the Hamptons-hopping media elite. But her struggles with singlehood struck a chord, making her a citywide—and soon nationwide—sensation.

Beverly Hills, 90210 creator Darren Star brought Bushnell’s vision to an even wider audience when he adapted the column for an HBO series. His four main characters: Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda, and Samantha, forever branded the actresses that took on the roles, redefined women’s relationship to sex, and elevated the perception of singlehood. With their fashion-forward lifestyle, they launched a barrage of trends, from fabric flower accessories to Manolo Blahnik shoes to Cosmopolitan cocktails.

Read the rest of the description at Amazon.com…

And if you want to support Miranda, I mean Cynthia Nixon (the actress who portrayed Miranda) as she runs for governor of New York (yes, GOVERNOR) particularly as it is SATC’s 20th anniversary, head on over to store.cynthiafornewyork.com!  

Finally, if you’ve never experienced Sex and the City, the vault of treasure that is this show will be opened up on Friday, June 8 on E! Following a special Sex and the City episode at 7 p.m., hold on for the Sex and the City 20th anniversary marathon of every episode ever starting at 7:30 p.m.!

And here is a scene from the last episode of SATC (Spoiler Alert. Don’t watch if you don’t want to know how it all ends…):

Any thoughts?

The Top 10 Blog Posts and or Magazine Articles for Black Christian Women in May 2018

Hello World,

I’m back with my monthly roundup of blog posts and or magazine articles for black Christian women! So below is my Top 10 monthly roundup of blog posts and or magazine/newspaper articles for black Christian women for May ( but you don’t have be a black Christian woman to to check them out 🙂  As usual, let me know if you like my list! Enjoy and share!

2.”How Female Celebrities Used Their Met Gala Outfits to Both Honour and Subvert Religious Norms” by Katie Edwards

Excerpt: Solange Knowles paired her braided golden halo with a black du-rag, pushing back against the notion that heaven is white and reminding onlookers that contemporary African-American sartorial culture is also heavenly. In an interview on the red carpet, Solange stated that she was directly influenced by the Black Madonna and African saints. See more at: independent.co.uk.

3. “Beyoncé And The Intersectionality of Faith” by Sonya Eskridge

Excerpt: By now you have probably heard of the Beyoncé Mass. At first glance, this looks like an entirely blasphemous church service praising Queen Bey, and many people of faith have taken deep offense to the fact that it even exists. Some have outright refused to watch the investigative piece about the service, dismissing whatever value it may have simply because it looks unorthodox on the surface. See more at: madamenoire.com.

4. “Austin Channing Brown: White people are ‘exhausting’” by Emily McFarlan Miller

Excerpt:  “White people can be exhausting.” That’s the first line in Austin Channing Brown’s new book, “I’m Still Here: Black Dignity in a World Made for Whiteness.” Brown, who writes and speaks about justice and racial reconciliation, said she chose those words carefully. “Exhausting” was truer than “frustrating” or any other adjective she tried, and, she said, “In the whole book, I’m trying to be as honest as I can about what it’s like to be a black woman who navigates whiteness on a very regular basis.” Plus, she said, she didn’t intend to write an introduction to racial justice. She wanted to move the conversation forward by sharing her experiences that showed how hard and sometimes dangerous it can be for a black woman navigating white Christian spaces, while also celebrating blackness. See more at: religionnews.com. 

5. “They Were the Only All-Female, All-Black Team in a NASA Science Competition. Then Came the Hackers” by Gianluca Mezzofiore 

Excerpt: Three teenagers came up with an innovative way to clean lead-contaminated drinking water in public schools — an idea so smart it made the finals of NASA’s coveted nationwide high-school science competition. The trio — the only all-female, all-black group in the finals — engineered a filter that purifies drinking water in old public-school buildings by detecting impurities such as chlorine, copper, and bromine.But when NASA opened the contest to online voting, users from 4chan, the image-based online bulletin board, launched a campaign to hack the results, forcing NASA to shut down the voting. See more at: cnn.com. 

6. “From Dating to Marriage, He Had a 5-Prong Plan” by Vincent M. Mallozzi

Excerpt:  “Both Elizabeth and Michael are really gracious, hospitable and friendly people, each with a wacky sense of humor,” Ms. Augustin said. “They are also very much grounded in their Christian faith, which is why I thought they would be perfect for each other. But as it turned out, the timing just wasn’t right for them as both were going through difficult times, so there was absolutely no spark.” See more at nytimes.com. 

7. Tuskegee Names Lily D. McNair as its 8th President by Michael Tullier

Excerpt:  Dr. Lily D. McNair will become Tuskegee University’s eighth president after being unanimously selected by its Board of Trustees. She will serve as the first female president of the institution in its 136-year history. McNair currently is provost and senior vice president for academic affairs at Wagner College in New York City…Since Tuskegee University’s founding in 1881, it has been under the leadership of seven presidents — the first of which was Booker T. Washington, who led the institution from 1881 to 91915. See more at: tuskegee.edu. 

8. “White Woman Who Called Cops on Black BBQ in Oakland is Now a Meme” by Jessica Lipsky 

Excerpt: A woman in Oakland, California, who called the police on two black men barbecuing along Lake Merritt and became the subject of a now-viral video is now proliferating social media as a meme.  The woman hurled several racial epithets at the group and told them they’d soon be going to prison for their Sunday afternoon cookout, Newsweek earlier reported. In the video, the woman said her call had “nothing to do with their race.” The woman spoke with police, who arrived on scene to find both parties complaining of harassment. The officers wrote a report but issued no citations, made no arrests and allowed the barbecue to continue. In response, Oakland residents held a huge cookout on the same site on May 10. See more at: newsweek.com. 

9. “‘I Love Hate Speech’: Sarah Braasch, the White Woman Who Called Police on Black Yale Grad Student for Napping in Dorm, Defends Slavery and Supports Burqa Ban in Writings” by The Grio

Excerpt: “I was placed on the pro-slavery side of the argument. I remember spending many an hour in the local public library poring over Time Life books… And then I had a eureka moment. Some—not many, but some—of the slaves didn’t want to stop being slaves. A small number wanted to remain with their owners or return even after being freed. I knew I had just won the debate. And indeed, I did. I led our team to victory. The pro-slavery contingent defeated the abolitionists because, in a democracy, in the land of the free, who are we to tell people that they can’t be slaves if they want to be? Who are we to tell someone that she has to be free? Who are we to tell someone that she has to be regarded as fully human?” See more at: thegrio.com. 

10. “Black Ministry Students At Duke Say They Face Unequal Treatment And Racism” by Nick Chiles

Excerpt: “One of my classmates was sitting in a class, and she texted me and asked me to come to her class because a student was in her class saying, ‘N****** like you come here and think that you can just change everything. Why don’t you just learn what Jesus is really about?’ ” said Amber Burgin, president of the Black Seminarians Union, who is in her third year at Duke Divinity. “We are in classes trying to pull each other out of class to hear people making inappropriate slurs, like a white student calling someone a jigaboo and then claiming they didn’t know what that means. Or a white classmate calling a black classmate ‘ghetto.’ … I’ve had classmates who have had to take leave; I’ve had classmates who have left the program because they were tired of being treated in such a way.” See more at: npr.org.

If you know of any black Christian women bloggers and or writers, please e-mail me at jacqueline@afterthealtarcall.com as I’m always interested in expanding my community of black Christian women blogs and websites. As I noted before, while this is a roundup of interesting blog posts and or magazine and newspaper articles for black Christian women, you don’t have to be one to appreciate these pieces  🙂.

Any thoughts?