Match.com Archives - After the Altar Call

Hello World,

There are many quests in life…the quest for happiness, the quest for the right job, the quest for meaning, the quest for God, the quest for the right mate and on and on…Today, I want to illuminate a bit about a quest for the right mate. From the time I admitted to myself and to God that I really wanted to be married to the actual time I said, “I do” was about 10 years! Yes, I was on this quest for roughly a decade…Still, it was all worth it in spite of the time and heartache I went through…

I’m not ashamed to admit that I used many methods to meet nice men. One of my methods was online dating. Despite its nearly SAT of an introductory questionnaire, I tried eHarmony. I had many conversations with several men, but I only went out on dates with two of the men. One of the men was a nice attorney who actually lived in the same county where I lived…How coincidental is that? While we didn’t have chemistry based on our first date, we ended up being friends…The second gentleman I went out with struck me as “touched.” He had changed his name much like Prince changed his name to a symbol and one of his aspirations was to open a franchise of churches…His words not mine…We met a restaurant here in town. I drove there in my car and he drove in his car. He had some issue with his car. A rental car or something…The details are hazy now…Anywho, after we had dinner, he invited me to go to another location, some kind of game place. He suggested I leave my car and ride with him…As they say, mama didn’t raise no fool…I didn’t get in the car with him and there wasn’t a second date…

Anywho, my point in sharing this snippet from my dating adventures is to share that dating online is a great way to meet people you may not encountered in your everyday life for whatever reason, but you have to be cautious…

I don’t know if Sean Patrick Banks is guilty of raping two women he met on Christian Mingle and match.com, but I hope this story encourages people to be cautious in their quest in meet a mate whether on or offline…

Any thoughts?

P.S. Just because a man claims to be a Christian does not mean he is not “special,” “touched”…you know what I mean…use your smarts before you give away your heart…

Hello World,

If you know me, you may be wondering why I, a single woman (with a boyfriend), would be qualified to write a post about divorce prevention…Well, I submit this…What’s the best way to not get divorced? My answer: Not Marry The Wrong Guy…And that I have managed to do so read on…

Today’s post is dedicated to my fellow soon-to-be single sister Kim Kardashian, who as we all know by now, opted to file for divorce from NBA player Kris Humphries after a mere 72 days…But this isn’t her first divorce although her first ex-husband Damon Thomas, a music producer, was reported to file for divorce in this marriage…

The next time that Kim K. decides to get married (and I’m betting that she will since she really seems to want to be a wife), I suggest that she crack open a Bible…Reading these surprising scriptures will likely give her a new perspective on what to look for…

Everyone at some point has heard about 1 Corinthians 13 aka The Love Chapter or he that findeth a wife findeth a good thing or the be equally yoked verse.While these are great verses, they are used over and over again to help people select a mate…The Bible is full of other great but not as popular verses that just may surprise you…

“Now let it be that the young woman to whom I say, ‘Please let down your pitcher that I may drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I will also give your camels a drink’—let her be the one You have appointed for Your servant Isaac. And by this I will know that You have shown kindness to my master.” Genesis 24:14 Maybe Kim should consider an arranged marriage (Read the whole chapter for the entire story)….Before you start rolling your eyes, just think about it…The divorce rate in this country should make all of us reconsider what constitutes marriage. Check out this interesting article “Marriage Around the World” on Oprah.com.
“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. ” Romans 12:2 In the world of the Kardashians, it seems that only athletes (Bruce Jenner, Lamar Odom, Kris Humphries) or people somehow connected to Hollywood are suitable mates. Kim should try dating outside of her family’s type and maybe then she would be able to make a more informed decision about whom to marry…Dating outside of Hollywood via Match.com worked for Essence Atkins of TBS’ ‘Are We There Yet?’
“Where no wise guidance is, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.” Proverbs 11:14 It has been reported that Kim & Kris recently saw the pastor that married to help them get closure. I hope that Kim continues to seek guidance from a pastor or a therapist to help her sort through her issues in her failed marriages. If you are the common denominator in a pattern, then you must address it…And she is in Tyler Perry’s new movie “The Marriage Counselor!”
“So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her.” Genesis 29:20 From various conversations I’ve had with men and personal experience, I’ve learned that men respect you more when they work to get your love. Kim & Kris met, married & will divorce in just over a year…Maybe if Kim had let Kris work for her love for a long while, she may have discovered that he just wasn’t The One…
“His mouth is sweetness itself; he is altogether lovely. This is my lover, this my friend, O daughters of Jerusalem.” Song of Solomon 5:16 I think your husband should be your lover and your friend…Being someone’s lover can happen automatically, but being a friend takes time…From what I’ve read, Kim eloped in her first marriage when she was just 19 years old suggesting an impulsive pattern that just isn’t working for her… patience is a virtue…
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33 Maybe Kim should take a break from dating and develop her relationship with God first. Maybe if she seeks God first instead of a mate, He may bless her with a mate that is beyond her wildest dreams…They say the right one typically shows up when you’re not looking…
“Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am.” 1 Corinthians 7:18 This verse brings me back to my original point. The best way to prevent divorce is to not get married…After all, marriage ain’t for erebody…Just ask Halle Berry…