Tag Archives: mother

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I Was Not a Kevin Samuels Follower, But I’m Sad His Mother Learned of His Death on Social Media…

Hello World,

It was only on Friday that I watched my first Kevin Samuels’ YouTube video after I saw his name splashed across social media following the announcement of his death. And these social media streets can be savage. Sadly, Kevin Samuels’ mother, Beverly Samuels-Burch, learned about her son’s death on social media, according to NBC News. As a new mother, I cannot imagine learning of my child’s death in such a way…

Since I didn’t know much about him, I was glad that The New York Times saw fit to write about him. Here’s the link if you’re intrigued as well…

May God have mercy on his soul, and my sincere condolences are extended to Ms. Samuels-Burch particularly on this Mother’s Day…

Any thoughts?

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Resilience & the Bible: How to Use Scriptures to Bounce Back From – Stiff Person Syndrome

Hello World,

Y’all, I know. It’s been a minute since I last blogged. Things are happening in my life that have made it challenging to blog on my regular schedule, but I’m attempting to get back in the groove as of right now.

Anywho, on today’s post…so in 2015, I started a  seven-month interview series entitled “Resilience & the Bible” which is about how Scriptures can be used to bounce back from the trials we all have to go through from time to time. The last post in the series was published in 2016, but I only posted five interviews. So I owe you two!!! Since I’m getting back in my blog groove, I’m trying to make sure I follow through with important blog content for you my dear readers. In 2020, the concept of resilience is more important than ever as I am guessing that we’re all bouncing back from trial during this trying year.

So without further ado, let me introduce you to the courageous Tisha Foster , author of a book titled My Journey With God Through Stiff Person Syndrome. Tisha, who is also a mother, hopes to inspire others through her journey and create more awareness around the rare syndrome which affects one in one million people. Please see my interview with Tisha below…

1. What is Stiff Person Syndrome, and how were you diagnosed with this condition? It was thought that you had multiple sclerosis. How is Stiff Person Syndrome different from MS? 

According to the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke, Stiff Person Syndrome (SPS) is a “rare neurological disorder with features of an autoimmune disease.  SPS is characterized by fluctuating muscle rigidity in the trunk and limbs and a heightened sensitivity to stimuli such as noise, touch, and emotional distress, which can set off muscle spasms.  Abnormal postures, often hunched over and stiffened, are characteristic of the disorder.  People with SPS can be too disabled to walk or move, or they are afraid to leave the house because street noises, such as the sound of a horn, can trigger spasms and falls.”

I was diagnosed through extensive blood work and MRI in 2011.

Both MS and SPS involve the immune system, and both attack the nervous system. But MS doesn’t attack the nerve cells – instead, it attacks the supportive cells. Stiff Person Syndrome doesn’t. Symptoms of MS include dizziness, vision loss, and numbness. Stiff person symptoms include spasms and back pain, and it always comes with something like hypertension, Graves’ disease, or cancer.

2. Describe your lowest point with Stiff Person Syndrome. 

My lowest point was when I was just lying on my bed, feeling worthless. I felt as if I had lost my faith and, therefore, my battle and was contemplating suicide. I knew that it wouldn’t be fair to my parents being an only child, and it would have been very selfish of me to my kids who didn’t ask to be here and for their mother not to love them enough to want to be here for them. Life is way too precious just to cut it short on my own.

3. What Scriptures did you use to lift yourself from your lowest point? And how have they helped you? (Why did you choose them?)

Psalms 40:1-3 

I waited patiently for the Lord;  He turned to me and heard my cry.  He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in Him.

2 Corinthians 12:9

But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Hebrews 4:15

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet He did not sin.

I chose those because they were very uplifting in what I was dealing with, and I would just go with what the Holy Spirit was laying on my heart. There were lots, but I just named a few. Every scripture that I used helped me in one way or another.

4. Are you a member of a support group and or do you know anyone else with Stiff Person Syndrome, and how has a support group or knowing someone else with Stiff Person Syndrome helped you? Do you have a church family? Where do you attend church?

I have a church home called Community Church in Mount Poconos, PA. Also, I’m affiliated with the support group called Ashley’s Fight With Stiff Person Syndrome. 

A woman who was newly diagnosed woman purchased my book. After reading it, she reached out to me. She and I stay in touch. She gets to those low points as well and she’ll call me for comfort.

5. You prayed for two things at the start of your journey with Stiff Person Syndrome: that you would be able to take care of your youngest son and that you could wear heels again. How did you explain Stiff Person Syndrome to your children? Why these two prayer requests? How has God answered these two prayer requests? 

I have two children. At the time the disease attacked my body, I had a four-year-old and a young adult. I felt like my youngest son needed his mom, and my oldest son was already with my mother (his grandmother). I was asking to wear heels again because I was once a model and never wore sneakers. When wearing heels, I felt empowered and elegant – everything that is the essence of a woman. At that time, I didn’t feel pretty anymore and struggled with self-worth. So, that’s why those two prayers stood out for me.

When explaining the Stiff Person Syndrome to my children, my youngest son didn’t understand at first, so I had to walk him through the fact that my antibodies were attacking my muscles. My oldest son would attend doctor appointments with me, and the doctor would also explain it to him. My first main concern was that the disease was fatal, and once I found out it wasn’t, I knew I found myself in a battle I couldn’t fight on my own and needed God’s help.

So while resting,  bed-bound, God answered me. I got out of bed, and He said: ‘Live your life, go be a mother to your child.’ I slowly got back into heels that I would never throw away – and I will continue buying them. Always the day before church, I would ask God: ‘Can I wear these to church on Sunday?’  I would get a granted yes. God has definitely answered my prayers. 

6. Why did you decide to write your book My Journey With God Through Stiff Person Syndrome and was it difficult to share your story with the public?

Yes, because in a mix of the prayers I said to God, there was this: ‘If you can allow me to walk again and be a mom to my son, I will tell the world how good you are,’ and I wanted to keep my promise. The only way I would be able to tell the world is to write a book. Yes, it was very difficult to write this book and expose the trauma my body has gone through, but it actually humbled me.

7. What is your life like now? 

My life today is almost the same – in the sense that I am still the same person. I’m still very bubbly and outspoken. I am loving and giving. I just learned how to live with God. Being first and foremost, I seek Him at all times for everything. I travel, I get family time, I’m very much loved. I  just know today always to make sure God is first. I didn’t allow this condition to control my life. God is in control, and eventually, I’ll have my completion of healing.

Is there anything else you would like to share?

After being diagnosed with Stiff Person Syndrome, I truly believed life was over for me, but with God’s help, I continued to not only live but also enjoy life. Travel was one of the adventures I’ve undertaken despite being told I would be bed-bound for life. My book is a testimony on a hidden disability that affects millions. Check out more here:  godsangelinstilettos.org.

Also, I would like for people who are in a dark place and looking for God to guide them to know that He’s there and He would never leave them or forsake them. That He is who He says He is, and He does what He says He can do. God is so real, and I wish that I can just tell everyone. 

Below are the previous entries in the “Resilience & the Bible” series:

Resilience & the Bible: How to Use Scriptures to Bounce Back From – Rebellious Teenagers

Resilience & the Bible: How to Use Scriptures to Bounce Back From – Losing Your Home

Resilience & the Bible: How to Use Scriptures to Bounce Back From – Losing Your Voice

Resilience & the Bible: How to Use Scriptures to Bounce Back From – Racism & Prejudice

Resilience & the Bible: How to Use Scriptures to Bounce Back From – Domestic Violence & Divorce

For more Bible scriptures online, go to BibleGateway.com.

Any thoughts?

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When Mothers Day Is Not Necessarily Happy…7 Women Share Their Experiences…

Hello World, tears

Happy Mother’s Day to my wonderful mother Mrs. Alice May Holness, whom I have written about in “Alice May, It’s Your Day (Happy Mother’s Day to All Mothers).” The older I get, the more I appreciate all that makes her uniquely her. Her no-nonsense Jamaican sensibilities tempered with her fierce love for her family and church family. Her interest in modern pop culture (she knows who Nicki Minaj is by watching “American Idol”) and commitment to seemingly old school values like cooking almost daily for family AND friends. Her commitment to femininity (one of her beliefs is that every woman must have a scent) and devotion to working out hard in the gym (her trainer has praised for her strength although she is one of the older ones in her group).

I am always happy to celebrate my mother on Mother’s Day!…And yet for many others, Mother’s Day is not necessarily happy…Because I want to honor all experiences on Mother’s Day, I’m devoting today’s blog post to those who may be divided about celebrating today or who would skip this day altogether if they could…Below are seven stories about these types of experiences…

1. “An Open Letter to Pastors (A Non-Mom Speaks About Mother’s Day)” by Amy Young

Excerpt – A pastor asked all mothers to stand. On my immediate right, my mother stood and on my immediate left, a dear friend stood. I, a woman in her late 30s, sat. I don’t know how others saw me, but I felt dehumanized, gutted as a woman. Real women stood, empty shells sat. I do not normally feel this way. I do not like feeling this way. I want no woman to ever feel this way in church again. – See more at: timewarp.com.

2. “My Baby Was Never Born. But I Was a Mom, Too” by Blane Bachelor

Excerpt – I’ve never been a huge fan of Michelle Duggar, but when she made headlines last year by holding a memorial service for her stillborn daughter, complete with images of the baby, I felt a certain solidarity with her. I’m sure her motivation wasn’t to shock people or stir up controversy; instead, she was simply validating the existence of her daughter to the world. Isn’t that the least we owe our lost children? See more at: washingtonpost.com.

3. “How It Feels To Not Have A Mom On Mother’s Day” by Madison Tate

Excerpt -Before she passed, I hadn’t considered myself to be a heavily religious person. I was always driven by curiosity, and facts and science answered my questions. However, as soon as I lost her, I knew I had to have faith. See more at elitedaily.com.

4. “#ThisIsWhatBlackMotherhoodLooksLike: Why I Gave My Child Up for Adoption” by Aprille Franks-Hunt

Excerpt – The dark cloud of acceptance in the instances of unwarranted shame that comes with being called a, “birth mom.” Which by the way, something about that term, “birth mother/mom,” seems so dismissive to me. As if, we’re no longer mothers because we chose to allow another woman to become one. See more at ebony.com.

5. “Muslim daughter and Christian mother celebrate unity on Mother’s Day” by Colleen O’Connor

Excerpt – When Alana Raybon converted to Islam, her mother, Patricia, — a devout Christian — was devastated, feeling that she had failed her faith and family. She also felt very angry at her daughter for fragmenting their family. See more at: denverpost.com.

6. “Recovering From a Nightmare, One Mother’s Day at a Time” by Rick Hampson

Excerpt – On the first Mother’s Day after her husband killed their two young children and then himself, several questions faced Zoey Mendoza: How do you survive a mother’s worst nightmare? How do you be a mother to kids you can no longer hug or kiss? How do you endure a holiday that honors something so precious that was torn from you so suddenly? See more at usatoday.com.

7. “Black Women and Mother Loss: 5 Steps for Getting through Mother’s Day” by Liz Alexander

Excerpt – There isn’t adequate language to describe the pain of mother loss and the permanent void it leaves. In fact, Hope Edelman, author of Motherless Daughters, reminds us that the pain and the void experienced differs depending on several different factors: the type of relationship the daughter and mother had while the mother was living; the age of the daughter when the loss occurred; and the actual cause of the loss (such as physical illness, suicide, abandonment, mental illness, etc.) Nonetheless, mother-loss has profound effects on a daughter’s identity, self-esteem, faith, and the overall quality of her life. See more at forharriet.com.

 Any thoughts?