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Who Are You Behind Your “Church Persona?”

Hello World!!!

A friend of mine sent me a link to this wonderful Web site, iamsecond.com, and it got  me thinking about these masks that are easy to wear at church…

At my church, it seems that I am eternally “the pastor’s kid,” although I am 35 years old. My church family have known me since I was six years old, but they don’t know all of me for sure…There are certain parts that I have kept hidden away because they don’t fit the image of “the pastor’s kid.” I’m not blaming them because maybe this is a self-imposed burden…no one ever asked me to keep certain parts of myself hidden, but nevertheless that is what I have done…

That is why I think this Web site is really cool because people are sharing their real stories and turning to Christ as their first line of defense against their struggles. Through the Web site, people share their stories of abuse, porn addiction, eating disorders, infidelity, divorce — and how they have been able to cope with these struggles through having a personal relationship with God. They have put Christ first, and their identities including their struggles are now second…

I have learned through various means how to be my authentic self, and it perplexes me how sometimes “church folk” try to make it seem that everything is always alright…That’s why it’s annoying when sometimes you ask “church folk” how they are doing and their standard answer, no matter what, is, “I’m blessed and highly favored.” Stop lying. You just ate a box of doughnuts, and you feel like you can’t stop eating no matter how hard you try…Or, you just spent the whole night looking at porn on the Internet…Or your marriage is a lonely facade although everyone thinks y’all are happy…Or your body is bruised courtesy of your husband’s uncontrollable anger…Yes, we are all “blessed and highly favored” for sure, but hiding behind that standard answer gets no one closer to the solution…

That’s why I was especially touched when gospel singer Kirk Franklin talked about his porn addiction with Oprah a few years ago…He certainly did not have to reveal his struggle…he hadn’t been caught in anything which is why many people reveal their struggles…Maybe being willing to confront struggles is one of the reasons why Kirk Franklin has teamed up with the American Heart Association and the American Stroke Association for the “Fight of Our Life Health Tour.” I heard Franklin talking about this partnership with Rev. Al on the radio last week. Rev. Al, who has lost a considerable amount of weight, commented that this partnership is particularly important in the black church where life can be preached upstairs and greasy, fried chicken and other artery-clogging foods are served downstairs. But that is probably true for many Southern churches, black or white….And let me not front, I love fried chicken, but I also know that we can be slaves to detrimental eating habits…I know that God doesn’t want us to struggle with that…

So who are you behind your “church persona?”

Any thoughts?

P.S. If you would rather not share your thoughts here, but need to talk to somebody, please go to the I Am Second Web site where someone is available 24/7.

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Sacrifice Ain’t Cheap…Romero’s Story

Hello World!!!

I hope all y’all are doing well…I’m not soo bad although from some of my posts, you may think that I’m a tortured soul ruminating on the deeper questions of life twice a week on this blog…uhh not really…I am blessed and lead a somewhat comfortable life…I am healthy…I have a supportive family that I see several times a week…I am employed in the profession that I was trained for in college…I have a vast network of eclectic friends that keep my social calendar pretty full…I am involved in organizations that bring meaning to my life…I could go on…but most importantly, I know that God is leading me and loving me although I am soo not worthy…(Good gracious, thank goodness I don’t always reap the consequences of my actions…His mercy endureth forever…)

So here I am counting my blessings and what not until I go to Bible Study last Wednesday…We watched a movie, “Romero,” which our Bible study leader explained to us is a good example of the type of climate that could have led to the writing of Revelation. The book of Revelation was written when “Christian churches, particularly those in the province of Asia, were going through a difficult time of social and economic pressure and even of persecution.” In Revelation, John recounts a series of visions he experienced designed to give comfort to the churches even as they were suffering for their faith…(I’m such a good Bible study student…) Our Bible study leader also explained that the movie was an example of liberation theology. Justo L. Gonzalez, who wrote the guide that we used to study Revelation, is a champion of liberation theology.

As I watched the movie, I was reminded of the famous quote, “When all is said and done, more is said than done.” Ain’t that the truth?! Thankfully, we in America are not called to sacrifice our lives in support of our faith or even our moral ideals very often…But in other countries, if you call yourself a Christian and are truly committed to the principles in the Bible, you may be subject to death. Here in this country, we go to church on Sunday, praise the Lord, drive home and eat our Sunday dinner with nary a thought of anyone “calling us on the carpet” for our beliefs. Shoot, we may even hook up a few business contacts at church…It just doesn’t have to be that serious…

In the movie, Archbishop Oscar Romero lived a somewhat comfortable life as a top bishop in El Salvador in the late ’70s. He was admired and revered, but he was also seen as a non-threat to the powers that be in El Savador at that time. During this time, the country was engaging in a civil war, and the government was against poor groups of people organizing and working to attain civil and other rights for themselves…sounds vaguely familiar, huh?

Other priests were actually disappointed that Romero was appointed to the position because they did not feel he would be involved in the plight of the poor. And at first in the movie, that is what happened. When he wasn’t conducting Mass and blessing babies, he was hobknobbing with the rich and powerful. When priests tried to tell him the government was sanctioning the murder of innocent poor people, he dismissed them. However, when one priest, Rutilio Grande, Romero’s friend, was killed, he realized that what he dismissed was true. He could no longer ignore the terrorism of the poor.

During the course of the movie, Romero witnessed the torture of other priests and was even ridiculed and jailed himself. He saw scores of people getting slaughtered and realized that many were forced to live in deplorable and inhumane conditions. And in the final scene of the movie, Romero, himself, was assassinated while he conducted mass – a true martyr for Christ. So here is a question I have for you and me too: Is faith worth sacrificing your life for? Right now, I say yes, but it has never been demanded of me either…And I pray to God it never will…

Any thoughts?

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Random Ramblings aka I didn’t have a topic but bear with me…

Hello World!!!

As I stated in my title, I don’t have a specific topic, but that’s okay…I think you will be entertained by the random collective of thoughts that have entered my mind lately…at the very least, you will feel sorry for me and perhaps leave a comment to make my day 🙂

1. Just to get it out of the way…What grade would you give President Obama on his first 100 days? Uh duh, if you compare him to our former president, that would be a high “A!” However, financial guru Clark Howard, who truly seems like a nice man, has criticized the Obama administration for its continuing involvement in bailing out GM. Yesterday, he asked his listeners what they want to happen with GM since we are now part owners of the company through our tax dollars…

2. Do y’all think the Craigslist killer’s fiancee had any idea that her man sought the erotic services of women on Craigslist not to mention what he did to them once they hooked up…To be fair, the medical student who had planned to get married in August hasn’t been convicted of the crime, but all of this has got me thinking…When you’re in a relationship with someone, can you really be completely fooled by that person…I mean you may not know that you’re man has a gambling problem for instance, but you wonder why he disappears so much…I briefly dated this old, married man in college…Of course, I was unaware that he was married and once I discovered that, it was over…But even before I discovered that, I could tell he was lying about his age…If you and your girl both sport Jheri curls in your high school prom picture, you were not born in the 7os….

3. A subscriber to this blog (yes, I actually have a few subscribers) said that she notices that black men (and she is black) don’t bother to hold the door open for her and other women while white men or men from other cultures do…she asked me to write about this phenomenon so I decided to pay attention and see if she had a point…I noticed that some men do and some men don’t, but I didn’t notice that one group was any more likely to hold the door open for me…what are your thoughts?

4. Would you think less of a Christian person if you saw him or her get tipsy at a party every now and then? Is it wrong for Christians to drink period? A little champagne never hurt anybody…

5. Should the “swine flu” be called the “Mexican flu” in deference to Jewish people and Muslims?

6. Is it possible to really fall in love more than once in your lifetime?

7. I will have an extended post about this next month, but in the meantime, what do you think of pre-marital sex for Christians? Is it really that bad? Is it just an antiquated Biblical notion clearly not meant for people who have waited well into their ’30s to get married…(Stop looking at me…)

8. Were y’all aware that Rev. Al and Warren Ballentine will be back on the radio in Atlanta as of today? However, their programs will now be broadcast on AM rather than FM…on 1380 WAOK to be exact…that’s good news! It’s soo not true that black people only want to listen to R&B all day long as a radio exec recently told me.

9. Is anyone else a fan of Lil Wayne? I know he seems crazy, but in some sort of impish way, he is cool to death…

10. Does size really matter? If your man presented you with a little bitty engagement ring, what would you do? This was a hot topic discussion among my girls a couple of weeks ago…I don’t have to have a huge rock, but semi-huge would suffice…I would rather have a nice house than a huge rock…But TRUST and BELIEVE, that does not mean I would be happy with a simple gold band…Would it be okay to go behind his back and exchange the stone if it was too small…Steve Harvey was talking about this topic as well…Have y’all read his book? What do you think?

Any thoughts?

P.S. Doesn’t Lil Wayne look like somebody’s baby boy desperately trying to be hard in this pic? Goodness, maybe I’m maternal after all…And I also included a video for his song with Babyface, “Get Too Comfortable.” Face can make anything sound good…