Preachers of L.A. : Sayin’ It Like I Mean It…

Hello World,

I must confess when I started hearing about the new reality show “Preachers of L.A.” earlier this year, I thought “here we go.” Don’t get me wrong. I’m a fan of reality shows. I started watching MTV’s “The Real World,” the first official reality show in college and even considered auditioning to be on the show. But back then, although the show had it’s fair share of likely contrived drama, the show did seem to be a realistic and sometimes even poignant portrayal of the lives of people you would probably never meet. I remember being particularly struck by Pedro Zamora, who revealed that he was living with AIDS. At that time, I had never met someone (as far as I know) that was living with AIDS and his inclusion in the show gave me an opportunity to see someone living and coping with the disease.

But now, chile please, reality shows seem to be scripted, over-the-top, spectacles designed to either launch of the pop culture career of some fame addict or revive the career of people who may be talented but have lost their platforms for whatever reason. But let me not be a hypocrite. Trust and believe I will be watching the “Real Housewives of Atlanta” when season 6 premieres tonight! (Is Todd an opportunist or is he really the one?)

But when gospel artists and other Christians began diving into the swamp of reality programming, I was giving them the side-eye but watching to see what happened. I like Mary Mary’s reality show. They are bonafide celebrities without the show, and their fans are able to see the women behind the award-winning gospel duo. I gave the “The Sisterhood,” which featured preachers wives from Atlanta, a chance, but the fact that some of them weren’t technically First Ladies and some of the crazy things that were said on the show made me stop watching after a few episodes. I guess I wasn’t the only one because the show was canceled. I never watched “Preachers’ Daughters” because I have been a preachers’ daughter for as long as I can remember so I don’t need to see that on television. Is that show still on?

If you’ve noticed, all the reality shows I’ve mentioned above thus far have featured Christian women, and that is to be expected. I bet women are the main target audience of most reality programming anyway. And let’s be real. Women, we can be really messy, and we like some mess too! I’m sure that when I get to heaven, I will no longer like gossip, but right now, I’m praying to be freed from the gossip demon! LOL! And it sure don’t help that I’m a reporter by trade! I never expected men of God to get involved in this mess! My husband can’t stand that I watch the “Real Housewives of Atlanta” and even refuses to be in the room when I do. So when I heard about the “Preachers of L.A.,” I was like, “Really, men of God, really?”

So now that the show has been on for a month, I must confess I have watched every episode. And now, I feel I am capable to giving an informed opinion about the latest “reality” offering. I must saying watching a reality show about the life of someone is kinda like being their friend on Facebook. Either you’re opinion of that person will get better or worse, but it won’t stay the same. Prior to the show, I was somewhat familiar with three of the preachers – Bishop Clarence McClendon, Pastor Deitrick Haddon and Bishop Noel Jones.

Here is my opinion of them now:

Bishop Clarence McClendon – I ‘ve really only seen Bishop McClendon as I was flipping through channels either late at night or early in the morning. I’ve never stopped to listen to any of his sermons. He seemed to flashy for my taste. I prefer a more humble looking pastor. Not that you have to have holes in your shoes or anything, but I don’t…something about the flashy look screams salesman. And based on at least one episode where he was arguing with Dietrick Haddon about not going agreeing to speak at churches that couldn’t afford to pay him and accommodate his entourage, my five-second appraisal seems to be right.

Pastor Dietrick Haddon – First of all, this man can blow. Period. The End. No doubt about it. But I must confess, I like him a little bit less after watching the show. I like the way he challenges the other preachers – like the time he challenged Bishop Ron Gibson to show him where the Bible states that “no shacking” is allowed in defense of him considering living with his then fiancee Dominique. But dude is waaaay too emotional for my taste…I’m like “that down a thousand” every.single.episode. But his over-the-top emotionality is not a testament to his character or anything…He actually seems to be refreshingly real about all the contradictions that Christians deal with from time to time living in this fallen world…he just couldn’t be my man with all of that goin’ on…

Bishop Noel Jones – I saw Bishop Noel Jones speak for several nights as the featured speaker at 98th Hampton University Ministers’ Conference in Hampton, Virginia. To say this man is not a enthralling speaker would be wrong. I was captivated every night. But he is coming off too “single and ready to mingle” on the show for me. The woman that he could be dating is Loretta, who is also a business partner. But their relationship is not defined on the show. She is just there. He is cool with her but that’s about it. I went to therapy behind men like that. They cool with me. They just didn’t want to define their relationship with me. We just kickin’ it. Please. In the words of Sweet Brown, “ain’t nobody got time for that!”

Pastor Jay Haizlip – First of all, he is just as cute as he wants to be 🙂 He is a little flashy too with his perfectly coiffed hair and slim fit jeans, but somehow, his image doesn’t rub me the wrong way. Plus, he seems to be a really nice guy. I liked his interaction with the woman in the park who appeared to be an anorexic in crisis. His relationship with his wife also seems to be very genuine. But he’s probably too boring to be featured on the show very much….sad to say…

Bishop Ron Gibson – He’s actually my favorite preacher thus far. I like his Magnum P.I. mustache, but more importantly, I like the way that he continues to reach out to the hood where he came from. The episode in which he brought two O.G.s to a shoe store to try on some church shoes was really nice. (Did he actually buy them shoes though?) And I like the way he is trying to help his sister who is a drug addict. Now, his wife Christy, however, likes to get stuff started. Did y’all see the episode where they had the tea party and invited Bishop Noel Jones’ girlfriend I mean “friend” I mean business partner I mean…I don’t even know what I mean…She know she just wanted to get in their business….

Pastor Wayne Chaney – Hmmm…I don’t what to say about him because he really hasn’t been on the show very much at this point. His wife seems nice, and she is pretty. Her blossoming friendship with First Lady Christy seems to be genuine…I guess more will be revealed…

Did y’all see them on Arsenio last week…Arsenio challenged them to a “Preach Off.” No judgment, but I just cannot imagine my father or Dr. Charles Stanley (my second favorite pastor) taking part in a “Preach Off” not even even when they were younger…Maybe I’m wrong, but I just can’t see it… If you haven’t seen the video, take a look…

And in the second video, they address their haters…Bishop Noel Jones said if you don’t have any haters, you’re not that gifted…Meoowww…

Any thoughts?

So You Want To Write a Book?

Hello World, 

I have wanted to be a book author since I learned how to read! Thankfully, my dream was realized in 2012 when my first book “After the Altar Call: The Sisters’ Guide to Developing a Personal Relationship With God” was released. And now I’m working on my second book – a novel about four women (three who are single and one who is married) searching for lasting love in Atlanta, the media-proclaimed capital of the tragic single black female. It’s my love letter to single black women and the A and an ode of sorts to my single years in the A…More to come…

If you have ever dreamed of writing a book, you need to check out this FREE conference this weekend! Presenting SORMAG’s Online Conference 2013 which will be held Nov. 1-3. Below is more information about the conference. I will be participating in three panels: “Meet the Christian Author,” “Networking” and “Marketing.” For more information about the conference and to register, go to this link.

DAY 1 – New Writers – November 1  sormag

Online Panels – These panels will be hosted on the blog.

Editing

1. Dyanne Davis

2. Alice Wootson

3. Rose Jackson-Beavers

4. Cindy Matthews

5. Rae Lori

6. Sherelle Green

Turning an Idea into a Book

1. Leslie J. Sherrod

2. Alice Wootson

3. Nathasha Brooks

4. Angel de Amor

5. Sherelle Green

6. Dorcas Graham

Ask The Author

1. Abiola Abrams

2. Leslie J. Sherrod

3. Alice Wootson

4. Serenity King

5. Cindy Matthews

6. Rae Lori

7. Barbara Joe Williams

Creating An Ebook

1. Pat Simmons

2. Lyn Cote

3. Rae Lori

4. Terri J. Haynes

5. TL James

6. Tremayne Moore

How to Start a Street Team

1. Piper Huguley

2. LaShaunda Hoffman

Time Management

1.Shelia Goss

Meet The Publisher

Gwen Hayes – Entangled

Suzanne Hartmann – Castle Gate Press

Andrea Wilson – Divine Garden Press

Live Panels – These panels will be hosted live on the phone.

Why Your Kindle Book Isn’t Selling – 7pm central time

1.Cheryl Ferguson – The Ferguson Literary Agency

How To Start a Writer’s Group – 8 pm central time

1. LaShaunda C. Hoffman

2. Terri J. Haynes

3. Piper Huguley

4. Frances Frost

5. Ann Fields

The Business Side Of Writing – 9 pm central time

1. Jennifer Cole AKA – Parker J Cole

2. Serenity King

3. Dorcas Graham

4. TL James

5. Piper Huguley

6. Dr. Linda Beed

DAY 2 – Readers- November 2

Online Panels – These panels will be hosted on the blog.

Meet The Christian Author

1. Pat Simmons

2. Leslie J. Sherrod

3. Lyn Cote

4. Rose Jackson-Beavers

5. Jacqueline Holness

6. Pastor Danyelle Scroggins

7. Dr. Linda Beed

Meet The Romance Author

1. Ann Clay

2. Dyanne Davis

3. Serenity King

4. Angel de Amor

5. Sherelle Green

6. Savannah J

7. Barbara Joe Williams

8. Rochelle Alers

Meet The Mainstream Author

1. Abiola Abrams

2. Shelly Ellis

3. Cheryl Lacey Donovan

4. Makenzi

5. Nevea Lane

6. Rita Karnopp

7. Marissa Monteilh

Meet The Non- Fiction Author

1. LaTara Bussey

2. D.S. White

3. Andrea Wilson

4. Abiola Abrams

5. Arnita L. Fields

6. Janice R. Love

7. Yvette Bentley

Meet The Poet

1.GPA

Live Panels – These panels will be hosted live on the phone.

How to Review A Book – 4pm central time

1. Dorcas Graham

2. Terri J. Haynes

3. Tremayne

4. Piper Huguley

5. Rita Karnopp

6. Michelle Monkou

7. Ella Curry

How To Keep A Book Club Going – 5 pm central time

1. Savannah J

2. Frances Frost

3. TaNisha Webb

Social Media and Readers – 6 pm central time

1. Abiola Abrams

2. Tremayne Moore

3. M.J. Kane

4. Tyora Moody

5. Ella Curry

6. LaShaunda Hoffman

DAY 3 – Published Authors – November 3

Online Panel – These panels will be hosted on the blog.

Using Kindle Author Platform

1. Lyn Cote

2. Nevea Lane

3. Shelia M. Goss

4. AlTonya Washington

Writing Sequels

1. Angelia Menchan

2. Shelly Ellis

3. Dyanne Davis

4. Angel de Amor

5. Pat G’Orge Walker

6. TL James

Blog Tour Providers

1. Paulette Harper

2. Renee Williams

3. Cheryl Lacey Donovan

4. Nevea Lane

5. Ella Curry

Networking

1.Jacqueline Holness

2. LaShaunda C. Hoffman

3. Makenzi

4. Ella Curry

5. Barbara Joe Williams

6. Lisa Y. Watson

7. Makasha Dorsey

8. Yvette Bentley

Always On Stage

1.Angela Breidenbach

Live Panels – These panels will be hosted live on the phone.

How To Work With a Book Club – 4 pm central time

1. Savannah J

2. Ella Curry

3. TaNisha Webb

Indie Publishing Panel -5 pm central time

1. Ann Clay

2. Rose Jackson-Beavers

3. Ruthie Robinson

4. Frances Frost

5. Rita Karnopp

6. Stephanie Casher

7. Marissa Monteilh

8. Dr. Linda Beed

Marketing – 6 pm central time

1. LaShaunda C. Hoffman

2. Jacqueline Holness

3. Paulette Harper

4. M.J. Kane

5. Cheryl Lacey Donovan

6. Ella Curry

Any thoughts?

The Light and the Life that was Lola…

 

LolaBrownYesterday, a wife, mother, daughter, friend and my Delta line sister Lola died…When one of my other line sisters told me yesterday, I was stumped. Although my line sister had been wrestling with the enemy that is cancer for 10 years, I never seriously contemplated that she would die. And then I thought about how mysterious and fragile life is…Yesterday was a regular Tuesday, I’m sure, for most of us. I went to work. I logged into Facebook way too many times. I drove home thinking about what I would be eating for dinner. Nothing extraordinary. And then I was told that my line sister had slipped away. Never to be seen on this side of Heaven again. Something extraordinary had happened and I hadn’t discerned it. But that’s life. The ordinary and extraordinary are juxtaposed all of the time even though we don’t always discern it…

19 D.R.S.

19 D.R.S.

I met Lola in the University of Georgia’s Athens in 1995, the year that we were made 19 Devastating Reflections of Sisterhood…Delta girls. I had longed to be Delta since an older cousin and a mentor both regaled me with stories of this dynamic sisterhood years earlier. And now was my chance to be set apart too. Although my insecurities warred within me, I managed to conceal them as I met the girls that would be my line sisters. Since I was teased about my looks as a child, I wondered if my beautiful line sisters would accept me as family. Lola was one of the most beautiful ones to me. Her slanted eyes, her creamy blemish-free skin, her sleek long hair made her stand out on campus. But her beauty wasn’t like a billboard – impossible to ignore but ultimately one dimensional.  She could sing. She could dance. She could step. She could play the piano. She had that VIBE, which is the line name our big sisters bestowed on her. And beyond all of that, she was just nice. As I got to know her, I was dumbfounded that she had insecurities too. She even told me that she admired me for my independence and strength! Being bullied for years does have some benefits I guess…

And then one by one, we graduated, not knowing but hoping that we were prepared to conquer the inevitable challenges of adulthood. I ran around Atlanta trying to get somebody to hire me at their company and chasing rappers and actors…I was surprised and maybe a tad ashamed when my line sisters started getting married and acting like adults because in many ways, I still felt like I was a child. Living with my parents until I was 28 years old didn’t help. Lola got married in 2001, and I was so happy that she had found someone that would maneuver the maze that is life with her. They became parents to a son not too much longer afterward. Adulthood looked good on her as just about everything did. And then breast cancer took a swipe at her. In 2003, she was diagnosed with breast cancer for the first time at 28 years old. The 20s were not supposed to be for breast cancer. Breast cancer was supposed to be a challenge for women in their 40s and beyond.  But one of adulthood’s lessons is supposed to be is far less common than what actually is. But a mastectomy later, we were all convinced that Lola was fine. At least that is we prayed for.

100_0394Statistics are just numbers until they play out in your life. According to the American Cancer Society, one out of every eight women will grapple with invasive breast cancer. Unfortunately, this statistic proved to be true for my line sisters. Our line sister Kimberly Hudson Causby died in May 2005 due to breast cancer. If we didn’t know before, we certainly knew by then the carefree college days were over. It was a big and distasteful dose of adulthood that we had to swallow and digest. And then six years later, a year AFTER the percentage of recurrence supposedly drops, in 2009, at 34 years old, my line sister Lola would have to square off with breast cancer yet again. This time, though, Lola would not be just a breast cancer survivor, she became a breast cancer champion.  From Maryland, she organized her supporters, friends, sorors and line sisters and got us to walk with her in the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk  in Atlanta in October 2010 although she was still completing her treatment. We honored Kim and we celebrated Lola! She had warred with breast cancer twice and only managed to become even more beautiful!

That same year I had been awarded a book deal to write my first book “After the Altar Call:

Celebrating Lo at Loca Luna...Isn't that cake beautiful?!

Celebrating Lo at Loca Luna…Isn’t that cake beautiful?!

The Sisters’ Guide to Developing a Personal Relationship With God.” I wanted to interview black women from varied backgrounds and experiences about their encounters with God. I knew I had interview my line sister because I knew her story would be a testament to the best of human strength born in Lola and the infinite and supernatural strength of God. She allowed to me to probe and maybe even pry until we crafted a story that would be permanent evidence of her victory. Now, the day after she has departed, the conversation that became a story is even more poignant. In October 2011, Lola organized all of us again and traveled back to Atlanta for us to take part in the walk for the second time. I was also in the midst of promoting my book, and I had scheduled Lola to be interviewed by Soror and Television Reporter Blayne Alexander of 11 Alive News. Lola was delighted to be interviewed and share her story during National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Again, a day after she scraped off her earthly clay to allow her heavenly spirit to shine through, I am so thankful that her story was captured on a screen.

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In February 2012, my book was released and Lola flew down to come to my book release party. Just seeing her and many of my line sisters celebrating one of my most cherished dreams finally becoming a tangible reality was a memory that will always warm me even on my coldest days. None of us knew that cancer, the gluttonous beast that it is, was waiting to attack my line sister yet again. A few months later, Lola told me the cancer had returned, but it was no longer breast cancer. It had metastasized to other parts of her body. I cried and prayed. If I were a perfect Christian, I guess I would have been free of fear, but I’m not so I wasn’t.  But I never imagined her dying. I just continued to pray. I asked my church to pray. After a few months and various treatments, she told her tumors shrank by 50 percent! And in October 2012, Lola and her Brown’s Babes as she named us in 2010 assembled ourselves together again for a third Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk. pink

Twelve years after Lola got married, I finally felt grown and grounded enough to take care of and be taken care by a husband. Most of this year has been devoted to wedding planning. I checked on Lola periodically and concluded that she was indomitable as she had been for 10 years, particularly when I received an invitation for the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk for this very month. This time, however, Lola opted to take part in the walk in Charlotte, North Carolina instead of Atlanta, Georgia. She told us it was because the walk in Charlotte was closer to home as she had moved back to South Carolina, her home state. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to make it because of some professional obligations here in Atlanta, but I told her that I sent in my donation in her name.

Last week,  a week as of yesterday, as I wrote my check, an ugly thought invaded my consciousness. “What if this is the last opportunity I will have to see her?” But I relegated that thought to the outskirts of my mind and mailed my donation. Lola thanked me for my contribution and I went on with the ordinariness of my day convinced that extraordinariness warns like a train horn when it is about to appear. As of yesterday, less than a week after the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk in Charlotte on Saturday, I now know that extraordinary had warned me but in my humanity did not perceive it.

Light is often compared with life. The strongest of lights are bright and illuminating and so are the strongest of lives…Imagine today Lola is with the Father of heavenly lights…I don’t know why the Father chose to take her when He did or even have her go through all that she went through when she was here, but I am confident that she has been completely healed and is in Heaven with Him…

Pray her husband, her son, her entire family, friends, sorors, line sisters…all of us that knew and loved her…

Any thoughts?