What Would Jesus Do About Bill Cosby?

Hello World,

If anyone has ever doubted the power of Google, just say three words. “Bill Cosby Rape.” In just over a month, just these three words have been able to tear down a career that took decades for the noted actor, comedian, philanthropist, author and more to build. Since fellow comedian Hannibal Buress first delivered these words as a part of a show in Cosby’s hometown Philadelphia on October 16, video of the show went viral, heightening interest in what Buress claimed…

I admit that I first came across an article in which the author alleged that Cosby had coerced several women to have sexual contact with him about three weeks ago. I quickly scanned the article but dismissed it an Internet hoax and or outright hogwash because Bill Cosby is Dr. Heathcliff “Cliff” Huxtable to me. And everyone in my generation knows that Dr. Huxtable is a noted obstetrician,  husband to wife, attorney Clair Huxtable née Hanks and father to their five children. Although Cliff and Clair were busy working parents, they took time to have fun together as a family. Remember when the family memorized a dance routine to Ray Charles’ “Night Time is the Right Time” to entertain Cliff’s parents as they celebrated their 49th wedding anniversary? And has having five children would suggest, Cliff and Claire took time for romance too, emanating unadulterated adoration as they gazed at each other listening to jazz greats like Betty Carter when she sang “Look What I Got.”

Dr. Huxtable is a proud graduate of the highly esteemed HBCU Hillman College and sent his daughter Denise, the original boho-chic fashionista, there. When she left the Huxtable nest, her college days were chronicled in “A Different World.” While at Hillman, Denise was schooled in the honor and high jinks characteristic of attending HBCUs although she didn’t graduate from the school. However, her friends Dwayne Wayne and Whitley Gilbert were able to carry on without her. In fact, they later married and moved to Japan when Dwayne got a job offer from Konichiwa.

Yes, these fictional characters became a part of my family. But now as these 16 women have recounted stories of starstruck naïveté, pills and forcible sexual encounters, I have been forced to extricate Bill Cosby from Healthcliff Huxtable. They are not one in the same. And I suppose that is one of the fallacies of fame – confusing an image with a person. Since the allegations have spread throughout the Internet, spawning by the day, FB friends have declared that they will no longer watch reruns of “The Cosby Show” and “A Different World,” networks have dropped the shows from their programming and while other people and entities have taken a more centric approach. I am a part of the latter group.

The journalist in me knows that 16 accounts of anything should be considered, particularly since the accounts seem to be similar. Many of the women themselves seem to similar (at least at the time they allege these encounters occurred) as they all paint a picture of Cosby as a powerful Hollywood player while they were young wannabe starlets eager to ascend with his influence. The home training advocate in me wonders just what did they think would be the end result of carousing alone with this married comedian. The realist in me wonders if the truth is also somewhere in the middle. Maybe Bill Cosby used his fame to attract the attention of these then young women under the guise of innocent fun. And maybe what happened between them was consensual until it wasn’t…

The fact of the matter is no matter what is proven in court or has not been proven in court or what Bill Cosby and his accusers have said or haven’t said, only Jesus is the ultimate and final arbiter of truth…

There are many Bible verses that I can list to support my point, but this verse comes to mind today…

The conclusion, when all has been heard, is: fear God and keep His commandments, because this applies to every person. For God will bring every act to judgment, everything which is hidden, whether it is good or evil.  Ecclesiastes 12:13-14.

Any thoughts?

 

 

 

 

Submission & Stove Buying…A Newlywed Story…

Hello World,

My all-time favorite TV newlyweds...Dwayne Wayne and Whitley Gilbert Wayne...

My all-time favorite TV newlyweds…Dwayne Wayne and Whitley Gilbert Wayne from “A Different World”

I wonder how long you are a technically a newlywed…According to Psychology Today, two years is the maximum to be considered a newlywed…That’s good because although Robert and I have been married over a year now, I’m experiencing new things all the time with him and have no idea how to navigate the newness…

One area that I am ever considering is the dreaded s-word…If you are a Christian wife, you already know…I am referring to SUBMISSION (yes Jesus…the word that scares me more than a Stephen King movie…And the only reason I can sleep in complete darkness now is because I have someone sleeping with me…so I’m a scary person by nature…) Ever since my pastor, who you know is my father if you have read my blog posts for any amount of time, preached on submission this summer, I have been wondering just what it means in my marriage or any marriage…

After I got over the weirdness of thinking my father preached that sermon directly to me (since he knows firsthand that no one but God is the boss of me), I started considering just what it means to be a submitted wife…I’m still not sure, so I kinda moved on in my head…(read: relegated it to the recesses of my mind) but when I saw a FB post by FB friend and fellow author Demetria Lucas D’Oyley, also a newlywed, I began thinking about S-word again in earnest…Basically, she said was wondering about the term and noted that it was a concept that rarely came up as she consulted with various married couples leading up to when she got married and that submission seems to be only a Christian concept…She got 146 responses from that singular post…I even commented a few times…

I made a few a definitive statements probably leading people to believe that submission makes me feel like this…

But the rest-my-hand-on-the-Bible truth is that submission makes me feel like this…

I want to speak in tongues and run all up and down the church aisle because seeking guidance from God because I just don’t know what to do sometimes...

Case in point…Yesterday hubby and I went to stove shopping…We agreed on a budget…That part went smoothly…But the rest of it…not entirely smooth…

First point of contention…Hubby and I have known for several months that we needed a new stove so because hubby is always excited about buying new gadgets even domestic ones, he researched various stoves that he thought would be a good months ago….Me, ever the procrastinator, didn’t start researching until yesterday…that’s right the day we had designated to shop…

Second point of contention…When I did started my research, I started with Clark Howard…He represents all things good when it comes to lovable geekdom and saving more and spending less…He recommends that you should NEVER buy an extended warranty on appliances because they are basically useless as most appliances are pretty reliable nowadays…Hubby disagreed with Clark…

Third point of contention…The bells and whistles…Hubby has duly noted that I…and I hesitate to admit this…am not a domestic goddess…Cleaning anything (except my body) is usually not my first thought…Should we pay for additional bells and whistles like self-cleaning and what not? Hubby said yes…Me…see above…I’m all about that saving more and spending less even if means that I only clean the stove if I think someone will see it…

By now, you are probably wondering did hubby have his way or did I? I won’t share all of my business here but I’m happy to say we are the proud owners of a brand new stove…the first time I’ve ever bought a major appliance even…

But this morning, I’m wondering what was the submissive thing to do in this situation?…

If you are unfamiliar with the term submission, below is how it is mentioned in the Bible…

 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Ephesians 5:22-24

Below are a few stories, interviews and blog posts I have found about submission that I plan to read and think about…

  1. “What’s So Scary About Submission: Six Secrets About What the Bible Really Teaches?” by Kevin Miller on todayschristianwoman.com
  2. “5 Christian Men Talk Candidly About ‘Distasteful’ Women, Submissive Wives and Why Sex Is So Important” by Nicola Menzie on christianpost.com
  3. “The Top 10 Things That Submission Is Not” on warriorwives.net
  4. “7 Misconceptions About Submission” by Mary Kassian on girlsgonewise.com
  5. “Liberated Through Submission With Bunny Wilson” by Nancy Leigh DeMoss on reviveourhearts.com

So how do you define submission, and what has it meant in your marriage? Does submission only work for Christian couples?

Any thoughts?

 

 

 

 

Honorary ‘Morehouse Man’ President Obama Challenges Morehouse Men to be Well-Rounded Men…

Hello World,

Brand new Morehouse Man President Obama!

Brand new Morehouse Man President Obama!

Normally I would have posted my Sunday entry on my blog by this morning at the latest, but I think you will understand why I opted to wait until later in the day for this entry. I braved intermittent rain and thunder, overflowing mud, heightened security, swelling crowds and long wait times in order to witness President Barack Obama address the 2013 graduating class of Morehouse College!

Early in the morning I arrived...

Early in the morning I arrived…

I left my home at 5 a.m. this morning to be a part of the media covering the first time that a sitting president has ever addressed a spring commencement in the state! In fact, the last time a sitting president made a commencement address in Georgia was in 1938 when Franklin Delano Roosevelt addressed the summer graduates at the University of Georgia! (Go Dawgs!)

As the media arrived, family and friends of the graduates filed in as well although it was not yet daylight. I spoke with some of them to document their thoughts and feelings on this historic day. Gary Williams along with Thomasina Williams came to see their “Atlanta

Gary and Thomasina Williams were among the first to arrive for the graduation ceremony...

Gary and Thomasina Williams were among the first to arrive for the graduation ceremony…

born and raised” son Garrett Williams graduate with a bachelor’s degree in computer science. “It is a great opportunity as far as Obama is concerned,” said Gary Williams, who got up at 3:30 a.m. to get one of the front row seats on Morehouse’s Century Campus. “I’m glad we have the opportunity to hear the president give his speech up close.” Thomasina Williams said she was also excited to see the president, but she was equally excited about witnessing the graduation of her son, who attended Shiloh High School. “This is the school that he chose. He was part of a program called Project Identity in high school so he got to visit different college campuses, but when he got to Morehouse, he knew he really wanted to be here,” she said. “He said, ‘Mom, if you can make this happen for me, I will never disappoint you and he hasn’t.” Gary Williams will begin working at Premedical following his graduation.

Jermaine Watkins searching through the program for the name Katenga Johnson...

Jermaine Watkins searching through the program for the name Katanga Johnson…

Jermaine Watkins came from Nassau, Bahamas to see his mentee Katanga Johnson graduate with an economics and philosophy degree. “I used to to be one his pastors at Abundant Life Bible Church in Nassau, and I came up here four years ago to drop him off,” Watkins said. “I’m very proud of his accomplishments, and I’m excited about his future as a Morehouse man.” Johnson will begin working as a missionary journalist for Operation Mobilization in London, England. (I’ve never heard of a missionary journalism! How cool is that?!)

Nicole Jenkins...

Nicole Jenkins…

Nicole Jenkins came in from Maryland to see her boyfriend James Jeter, who is from Washington D.C.,  graduate with a bachelor’s degree in English. Following graduation, Jeter will head to New York to work as a fashion designer for Ralph Lauren. “I couldn’t be more proud of him especially because he did this in three and a half years.”

A Detroit, Michigan resident, Cecilia Hewin traveled

Cecelia Hewins is ready for the rain...

Cecelia Hewins is ready for the rain…

to Atlanta to see her godson William Stephens graduate with a bachelor’s degree in business administration. “I am so proud of him. I believe he is the first college graduate in his family,” Hewin said. While she looked forward to seeing President Obama, Hewin emphasized that his presence was not her primary reason for attending the rainy graduation ceremony. “I’m excited about my godson, and Mr. President is next in line.” Stephens will begin working for Chrysler tomorrow.

Likely due to the presence of President Obama, the graduation attracted a fair amount of celebrities such as Jasmine Guy, who portrayed the loveable but “bougie” princess Whitley on “A Different World.” I even saw Kandi Burruss of “The Real Housewives of Atlanta” along with her fiance’ Todd in the audience.

Janie Hendrix, the sister of the late Jimi Hendrix

Janie Hendrix, the sister of the late Jimi Hendrix

Some of the graduates, however, were related to celebrities. I spoke with Janie Hendrix, the younger sister of deceased rock star legend Jimi Hendrix, who lives in Seattle, Washington. She was there to see her son Claytin Hendrix graduate with a bachelor’s degree in history. “Three of my four boys attended Morehouse,” said Hendrix. “I would sit through rain. I would sit through snow see my son graduate.” Claytin Hendrix plans to become a teacher.

Although the rain periodically doused the graduates’ family and friends, who were only separated from the elements by thin plastic ponchos, they continued to wait for the ceremony to start hours later.

Finally, the main event began as the graduates,

I was taking notes while dancing as these drummers announced the arrival of the graduates...

I was taking notes while dancing as these drummers announced the arrival of the graduates…

preceded by an African drumming group led by Giwayen Mata, marched in to meet their family and friends. Various notable alumni including the Rev. Raphael Gamaliel Warnock, class of 1991, were on the program; however, it was the valedictory address offered by Betsegaw Tadela of Addis Ababa, Ethiopia elicited the loudest cheers from the crowd and his fellow graduates and a hug from President Obama. His refrain throughout his speech was, “We will remember this day,” as he reminded his fellow graduates about the lessons they learned at Morehouse starting on their very first day on on campus. He also noted that while others may not remember the identity of their college graduation speaker (my hand is raised in the air unfortunately) years afterward, the 2013 class of Morehouse College will never forget their commencement

Betsegaw Tadele, the valedictorian of the 2013 Morehouse

Betsegaw Tadele, the valedictorian of the 2013 Morehouse

speaker for obvious reasons! Tadela, who graduated 3.99 grade point average will begin working as a software development engineer at Microsoft in Seattle, Washington following graduation!

Shortly afterward, President Obama spoke to the audience from the vantage point of the lone covered area of the ceremony layout, which was reserved for ceremony participants. The president started off by duly noting, “You all are going to get wet, and I would be out there with you if I could, but the Secret Service gets nervous,” he said as the audience laughed. “So I’m going to have to stay here, dry. But know that I’m there with you in spirit.” He also mentioned his brand new status as a Morehouse man as he received an honorary doctorate of laws degree. “You can always tell a Morehouse man, but you can’t tell him much,” he said with a laugh.

I ran into one of my fellow Georgia Bulldawgs' Monica Cabbler...

I ran into one of my fellow Georgia Bulldawgs’ Monica Cabbler…

As he continued to speak, he highlighted the rich history of the school which began with 37 men, free blacks and freed slaves, who mostly aspired to become teachers and preachers. He also discussed how Morehouse propelled the likes of Dr. Benjamin E. Mays, who served as the president of Morehouse for almost 30 years and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., who was a freshman at the school when he was mere 15 years old.

President Obama didn’t back away from mentioning the still challenged economy but reminded the graduates that their ancestors had much more difficult obstacles and succeeded in spite of them. “If you think you can just get over in this economy just because you have a Morehouse degree, you’re in for a rude awakening.  But if you stay hungry, if you keep hustling, if you keep on your grind and get other folks to do the same — nobody can stop you. ”

While they will begin building their careers following graduation, Obama admonished the graduates to not forget their communities and be an example for those around them. “In troubled neighborhoods all across this country — many of them heavily African American — too few of our citizens have role models to guide them.  Communities just a couple miles from my house in Chicago, communities just a couple miles from here — they’re places where jobs are still too scarce and wages are still too low; where schools are underfunded and violence is pervasive; where too many of our men spend their youth not behind a desk in a classroom, but hanging out on the streets or brooding behind a jail cell.”

President Obama in prayer...

President Obama in prayer…

He also said they should strive to be honorable husbands and fathers, nothing that in his last days he will not be thinking about legislation that he passed or even the Nobel Prize that he won. Instead, he will reflect on the time spent with his family. “I will be thinking about that walk I took with my daughters.  I’ll be thinking about a lazy afternoon with my wife. I’ll be thinking about sitting around the dinner table and seeing them happy and healthy and knowing that they were loved.  And I’ll be thinking about whether I did right by all of them.”

Finally, he compared being a Morehouse Man to being an American. “Members of the Class of 2013, you are heirs to a great legacy.  You have within you that same courage and that same strength, the same resolve as the men who came before you.  That’s what being a Morehouse Man is all about.  That’s what being an American is all about.”

Although the skies were cloudy and the rain had people scrambling every few minutes for shelter under trees or a few umbrellas, I’m sure, as Betsegaw Tadele said, “We will remember this day.”

Any thoughts?