P4CM (Passion for Christ Movement), the same movement that brought you Janette McGhee, who is better known as “MissTerious Janette…ikz” and her epic poem “I Will Wait For You,” is back with a web series premiering TODAY. The Conversation – hosted by comedian and actress Yvonne Orji –will explore topics from both the single and married perspective on what to look for in a spouse, communication in relationships, gender roles, being single & waiting and much more. (Incidentally, Orji has been cast in Issa Rae’s comedy pilot “Insecure!”) The first episode is entitled “The List” and will include conversation about what is on the list of qualities of an ideal man.
Below is a promo for the web series, and subscribe to the YouTube channel to see all of the episodes!
P4CM hopes that in exploring these topics, we will be able to foster a safe, freeing and insightful dialogue and become a resource for both singles and marrieds alike to receive godly advice for having healthy, holy and god-honoring relationships.
Far be it from me to judge what married and consenting adults do in their bedroom, but I have come across three articles that have got me thinking about sex, sex fasting and consent from a Christian perspective. A few days ago, actor and former football player Terry Crews got folks talking when he told The Huffington Postthat he and his wife of 25 years, Rebecca, fasted from sex for 90 days!
Below is the video.
Crews, who is a Christian, said the end result of the 90-day sex fast was that he was “more in love” and “more turned on” than before and that the couple’s emotional intimacy deepened. The Bible does address marital sex fasts. Check out the verse below.
Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 1 Corinthians 7:5
Do you believe that married couples should undergo sex fasts periodically to strengthen their emotional intimacy? Have you ever tried a 90-day sex fast as a married couple or for any amount of time? Did the marital sex fast work for you?
Now let’s switch it up a bit. What if one may want to fast from sex but is willing to have sex with his or her mate although grudgingly? After seeing the story “Christian Website: Don’t Look at Your Wife’s Face During Sex to Enjoy It Even When She Resists” on rawstory.com, this copulation conundrum piqued my curiosity! According to the post “How a Husband Can Enjoy Sex that is Grudgingly Given by His Wife” on the website biblicalgenderroles.com, if the wife isn’t really feeling sex at the moment but is still willing to get it on, the husband should focus “on her body, not her face.” The wife’s face (who is obviously giving the gas face because she doesn’t want to be having sex) is compared to Medusa’s face as ‘sin is ugly. Your beautiful bride’s face becomes ugly during this sinful time that she is grudgingly giving you sex as she grimaces wanting you to ‘just hurry up and get it over with.”’
Another biblicalgenderroles.com post was pointed out in rawstory.com as well. In the post “Is a Husband Selfish for Having Sex With His Wife When She is Not the Mood?” ,while a husband forcing himself on his wife or abusing his wife is not advocated, “despite American laws to the contrary, Biblically speaking, there is no such thing as ‘marital rape.’ In the Scriptures, the only way rape occurs is if a man forces himself on a woman who is not his property (not his wife, or concubine). A man’s wives, his concubines (slave wives taken as captives of war or bought) could be made to have sex with him, no questions asked.”
Now, the verse before the Scripture I referenced above states:
The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.1 Corinthians 7:4
Since I’m a pastor’s daughter, I’ve been to like a million weddings. I’ve heard those vows said every time, but I never really contemplated them until I said them myself on Aug. 10, 2013, the day I got married…As I repeated the words, “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance,” I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience. The natural me was in the moment saying those words, and the spiritual me, it seemed, was watching, hardly believing that I was making such an impossible commitment.
All that being said, I wonder if those vows where what Khloé Kardashian was thinking about when she rushed to Las Vegas last week to be with her estranged husband Lamar Odom following his drug overdose at the Love Ranch where he cavorted with ranch employees after apparently and or allegedly ingesting a near fatal cocktail of drugs. Thankfully, Lamar, who was unconscious for several days, survived his drug overdose. Yesterday, Khloé announced she put her relationship with Houston Rockets player James Harden on hold to focus on Lamar as he recovers. However as today, that hold is now a halt, as Khloé and Lamar, who got married in 2009, have called their divorce off, according to People magazine.
The romantic in me what wants to admire Khloé as she seems to be both honoring her marriage vows and demonstrating the love in 1 Corinthians 13 also known as the Love Chapter…Below are a few verses from the chapter…
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres…
And Khloé and Lamar, who did not expressly say their were Christians in this video which I saw on elev8.hellobeautiful.com, do claim there is a “spiritual side” to their marriage.
After what Lamar has reportedly put her through from alleged infidelity to rampant drug abuse to most recently “bogeying at a brothel,” she would be justified in not being at his bedside even if she prayed for him from afar. But not only did she keep vigil at his bedside, she is also keeping him! Why do you think she called off her divorce?
The cynic in me wanders if this reconciliation is just more fodder for the reality show “Keeping Up With the Kardashians.” The New York Post has reported Lamar’s recovery from his overdose will likely be featured on the show…
Within hours of Odom’s hospitalization, Khloé, Kris and seven-months-pregnant Kim had hopped on a private plane. According to Radar Online, they had a camera crew in tow. (The 11th season of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians,” filming now, premieres next month.) Caitlyn Jenner was en route.
By early Wednesday, media outlets such as TMZ, Radar, People, Us Weekly, E! (home of their reality show) and “Entertainment Tonight” suddenly had real-time updates and unobstructed views of matriarch Kris and her daughters outside the hospital, dressed in designer black dresses as if they were all widowed first ladies, straining to show distress on perfectly made-up, Botoxed faces.
The Kardashians let it be known that they “dropped everything” when they heard of Odom’s collapse, as if this were a heroic response rather than a merely decent one.
And she does have a book “Strong Looks Better Naked,” coming out on Nov. 3. In the book, she “doesn’t go easy on husband Lamar Odom,” according to Page Six. Her book, however, is supposed to be about “shar[ing] her secrets for finding strength of body, mind, and heart with revelatory stories of her own struggles with weight, relationships, and her self-image.”
Or could the motive be something else? Anyone see Tyler Perry’s movie “Diary of a Mad Black Woman” in which Helen McCarter agrees to take care of her estranged husband Charles although he left her to be with his mistress? After Charles was shot and paralyzed, his mistress leaves him, but Helen returns to his side to care for him AND exact her revenge which he definitely deserves. However, the two end up forgiving one another and becoming friends although they ultimately divorce.
What do you think?
The romantic in me hopes it was “ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t-live-without-each-other love.” (Shout out to SATC) Either way, I hope this incident is a wake-up call for Lamar and is his first step in recovering from his alleged drug addiction.
