Elder Mark A. Moore, Jr. & Other Black Church Leaders Should Be Careful About Elevating Scripture Above Therapy Following Suicides of Kate Spade & Anthony Bourdain…

Hello World,

I really hadn’t planned to post this morning because I’ve been out of town for a week and need to focus on returning to the more rudimentary rhythms of life. In other words, I’m readying myself to return to work tomorrow after a week off! But when I saw a Facebook friend’s post about a black church leader Elder Mark Moore Jr.’s Facebook commentary regarding Bible study and therapy, I knew I needed to weigh in about this very timely topic. Below is what he said…

I understand what Elder Moore is trying to say I guess, but in my experience and from everything I’ve read, the Black Church, historically, has turned to Bible study and prayer OVER therapy during a mental health crisis to its detriment. Here a few excerpts of articles I’ve found to support that premise…

From my very own blog:

‘Pain in the Pews’ Conference Highlights Mental Health & Ministry This Saturday!

Excerpt:  Do you feel like the church, specifically the Black Church, has appropriately addressed mental health and ministry? Please explain your answer.

No, I don’t think so. I think that historically, we have been taught just to “pray about it” – which, I agree wholeheartedly that we should pray about everything. However, it cannot stop there. If Sister Mary comes and says that she is suffering from depression and having suicidal thoughts, prayer along with ensuring that Sister Mary gets professional help is what is going to help to heal her. If someone says I have a tightness in my chest and my left arm is going numb, we are certainly going to pray, but someone is going to/should say “you need to go see a doctor.” The same advice given to someone with a physical ailment should be given when someone has a mental or emotional issue. That is not always the case in the Black Church.

Former Child Caretaker Dr. Sheila D. Williams Uses Background to Help Others With Mental Illness…

Excerpt:  How prevalent is mental illness in the black community, and what can the Black Church do to support mental health awareness and treatment? 

Within the black community, the subject of mental illness is still very taboo, unfortunately. There are many people within the black community who have undiagnosed mental illness or have been diagnosed with a mental illness, but chose not to take medication or get therapy. These individuals, unfortunately, are suffering in silence. By failing to see a mental health professional, to follow up with treatment or refusing to take prescribed psychotropic medications, their mental illness not only affects them, but it affects their families, loved ones and the entire community.

As a Christian woman, I have a strong faith, and believe in God and the power of prayer. However, at times in the Black Church we fail to acknowledge and expound upon the importance of physical and mental health. Although prayer and motivation are important, and I personally know the benefits of each, it is also important for the Black Church to encourage and promote mental health awareness. We often seek the help and advice of medical physicians, but we fail to seek that same help and assistance from mental health professionals when our emotional and psychological well-being is in jeopardy. I feel it a responsibility of all of us to promote and encourage 360 degrees of wellness, and this includes our mental health.

From The Huffington Post:

Gospel Singer Tasha Cobbs Says Black Church Can Help With Depression

Excerpt:  Cobbs was diagnosed with depression after attending her first therapy consultation, where she discussed her various symptoms. Now, the singer says she still attends therapy sessions once every month to make sure she stays “connected” with her therapist.

While there is a stigma attached to mental health issues in the black community and it is often viewed as a taboo topic to even discuss, Cobbs believes the issue should be considered a health priority — similar to other serious medical conditions.

“I think when you say ‘mental health,’ automatically people think ‘I’m not crazy,’ because we haven’t put a definition to exactly what we’re saying,” she said. “I believe when you say ‘it’s a mental health issue,’ it’s like having diabetes or something’s wrong with my toes or whatever the case is — it’s a medical condition and it can be dealt with. Just like you can manage a broken finger, you can manage mental health issues. I am a living witness that you can be freed and you can be cured and healed from it, but you have to first acknowledge that it exists.”

The suicides of Kate Spade earlier this month followed by Anthony Bourdain days later demonstrated in a dramatic way that no one, no matter the person’s social standing, celebrity status and wealth, is immune from mental health crises. I’m not discounting all of the people who don’t have a platform and suffer in the same way but because of the platforms of Spade and Bourdain, more people, I imagine, are paying attention to mental health issues.

As Elder Moore said, I do believe that Jesus still heals today but we cannot predict how He will heal and we have to use every resource available to facilitate that healing. I believe God has equipped some therapists and uses them to heal their patients. And some Christian therapists use Scripture in addressing mental health diagnoses. As my father was trained as a therapist and as a minister, I’ve never took part in the stigma about seeking counseling when needed. Bible study and prayer are indispensable tools that all should employ in health and wellness but they are not the only tools that God approves of and uses. I hope that more Black Church leaders come to this realization.

Alright, I think I’ve said all that I care to say except to point out I think that mental health issues are so hard for some people to grasp because the issues take place in the brain which none of us can physically see. But as Tasha Cobbs said, having a mental issue issue is just as debilitating as a physical issue. If someone has broken their leg in a car accident for example, you’re not going to advise that person to crack open a Bible and recite Scripture. I mean you can do it and it could be helpful, but you also need to get to a hospital. A mental health issue should be treated similarly. If someone you know is exhibiting suicidal tendencies, seek the help of a mental health professional and all the while you can be recalling Scripture and praying as you do it.

And below is a Scripture that applies to this post:

“Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.”  Proverbs 11:14

Do you feel that the Black Church elevates Bible study and prayer over therapy and medication when it comes to mental health crises?

Any thoughts?

Three The White Way – Why Three of the Black Male Actors in ‘The Best Man Holiday’ Married White Women…

Hello World, 

The ’90s were the golden age of black cinema…Let me hit you with just a few — “House Party” (1990) “Boyz in the Hood” (1991), “New Jack City” (1991), “Juice” (1992), “Menace to Society” (1993),”Jason’s Lyric” (1993) “Friday” (1995), “Above the Rim” (1995), “Waiting to Exhale” (1995), “Love Jones” (1997) and “The Best Man” in 1999…Although during the ’90s, I was a poor high school and college student and later a brand new journalist, a considerable portion of my non-existent budget was spent seeing these pop culture classics…

I think that’s why so many of us who came of age in this golden age of black cinema bombarded the box office last weekend, making “The Best Man Holiday,” the sequel to “The Best Man” rank second during its opening weekend, earning just over $30 million to the surprise of Hollywood…When we met Harper, Jordan, Lance, Julian, Quentin, Robin, Mia, Shelby and Candy in 1999, many of us where right where they were…We were recent college graduates and newly minted professionals…Many of us were getting married or watching our boys and girls from college days become other people’s husbands and wives…I identified the most with Jordan…I was more excited about nurturing a career than nurturing relationships and was often shocked when I watched my male buddies that I once had in abundance get married…

So when I started hearing the rumblings about a sequel to “The Best Man” a couple of years ago, I knew I would be among the first seeing just what happened to these beloved characters over the years…And my high expectations were exceeded! Dare I say “The Best Man Holiday” was better than the original! And like, that never happens! Can you name any other sequel that was better than the original?! I can’t. At least right now. Let me know if I’m wrong. These characters became even more rich with time, wisdom, hilarity and — tragedy. As in real life, when you are young, you live in a bubble in which life makes sense and your parents are always there to nurse your boo boos. After you’ve been an adult for a while, you realize that life, while beautiful, is less than sensible and some hurts never truly heal…I won’t spoil the movie because I still want others to see it…But I now consider it a classic…A definite must-see…

However, in spite of this movie’s brilliance, there have been unfortunate efforts to diminish this movie’s shine…And I just don’t get it…but I will write about it…We’ve all heard about USA Today and it’s “race-themed” commentary on the movie’s success..Also, the next day after I saw the movie last Saturday, I saw a Facebook post by one of my friends in which he noted that three of the four lead actors in the movie have been or are married to white women…As if to say, that the black on black love that we saw in the movie was just movie magic, hardly a depiction of real life…Okay, so you know what I’m talking about – Taye Diggs, who plays Harper, is married to Idina Menzel, who is white. Harold Perrineau who plays Julian, is married to Brittany Perrineau, who is white. Terrance Howard, who plays Quentin, has been married to white women…So what, I say?!! I didn’t watch a movie about Taye Diggs, Harold Perrineau and Terrance Howard! I’m watched a movie about Harper, Julian and Quentin….And yes, in real life, some black men marry white women, but I will not fall for the okey doke and not speak well of the movie because some of its actors didn’t marry women that look like me…And furthermore, there is nothing wrong with interracial relationships…So they married outside of the black race, but they didn’t marry outside of the human race!!!

And now let me address the Taye Diggs issue…Over the years, I have read that Taye Diggs has an issue with black women…I don’t know if this is true or not as I’ve never spoken to the man, but I am aware of the rumor…And yesterday, I read an article someone posted on Facebook about how Taye Diggs was happy to get back to his white wife after being with all of those black women on the set of “The Best Man Holiday.” And now, I’ve seen Facebook posts in which people declared they will no longer support Taye Diggs nor the movie. Maybe it’s because I’m a journalist that I know that first you have to consider the source…I have seen no mention of this statement from any reputable news outlet. Secondly, seeing a movie is not a sweeping endorsement of the every single life choice or belief of every actor in a movie. Thirdly, while I am no conspiracy theorist, I do believe there are forces at work that try to tear down legitimate successes…just who released this supposed story about Taye Diggs and why? Just something to ponder…

If you want to see a great movie with multidimensional characters that manage to touch every emotion on the spectrum, see “The Best Man Holiday.” And for those who want to get into Black Power arguments, have several seats (at the movies) at “12 Years a Slave,” which is the proper forum for this kind of conversation…

In sum, support.black.cinema.

Any thoughts?

P.S. Just a snippet of the fine black men in the movie…

I’m Bout It Bout It aka Marketing & Promotion Month 7 (And It.Don’t.Stop.)

Hello World,

Me and my lovely assistant at my first book signing at Lifeway Christian Store...

Wow. I got to thank God.

My book is out (as of Feb. 14), and it ranked as an Amazon Best Seller and was listed as an Amazon Hot New Release!!! My Facebook Fam (friends) are blowing up my page telling me they are buying my book! My folk at church who came to my release party are telling me how much they are enjoying the book! And I’m having book signings and what not!

I planted a lot of seeds (WORKED HARD), and God took care of the increase as only HE can do!!! Since I started writing these posts back in July when I started my marketing and promotion campaign (Check out the first one “I’m Bout It Bout It aka Marketing & Promotion Month 1…”), I had the goal of sharing what I have done to help authors behind me as they prepared to launch their babies aka books into the world, and I hope that some author who Googles marketing & promotion will read these posts and be encouraged…

Let me share some of God’s blessings as I’ve worked to get the word out about my book via my marketing & promotion campaign…(in no particular order as all were important accomplishments for me 🙂

  1. I’ve been featured on six radio programs! If you would like to hear me on “The Business of Wisdom” with Dr. Alvin Jones, please listen here! And I thank Shandra Hill Smith of Pullen Press for being an excellent publicist, and helping me with my radio exposure!!! At my first book signing at Lifeway Christian store, one of the ladies who came said she first heard about me on “Business in the Black” with Twanda Black on WALR KISS 104.1 FM. That was my second radio interview, and I think I sounded a bit rough – but thankfully, someone got the message I was trying to convey!
  2. I had over a 100 people at my book release celebration!!! To see the pics from that awesome night of support and love, please go here! Thanks Dwan Abrams for planning the party and spreading the word about it! And I am sooo very grateful for Sofn’free GroHealthy for sponsoring my book release celebration!!!
  3. Various author friends/bloggers featured my book on their blog!!! Thank you to Kathi Macias (kathimacias.com) who featured me on her blog on the day of my book release. To read the post, please go here. And Tayari Jones (yes, the one and only at tayarijones.com) featured me on her blog as well! To read the post, please go here. And other authors including Victoria Christopher Murray (my soror), Tiffany L. Warren (who is featured in my book), & Tia McCollors shouted me out on their Facebook pages! Tia & author Kendra Norman-Bellamy provided endorsement quotes for my book! Author love is a must!!! And I’m soo grateful 🙂 (I hope I’m not forgetting anyone…if so, charge it to my head and not my heart…)
  4. During October, National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, Blayne Alexander of 11 Alive for The Grio.com interviewed Lola Brown, who is featured in my book, about her two-time victory over breast cancer at 36 years old. To read the story or watch the interview, please go to thegrio.com.
  5. I was really encouraged when just as I started my marketing and promotion campaign, I was featured on SORMAG’s blog – sormag.blogspot.com, which is an important website for authors! To see that post, please go here. Thanks again LaShaunda Hoffman!!!
  6. I’ve also been featured in various print media outlets including UPSCALE magazine as well as local newspapers the Clayton News Daily and the Clayton Neighbor!!!
  7. And last but certainly not least, I want to thank Lifeway Christian Store for hosting my very first official book signing last Saturday! I hope, wish & PRAY it’s the beginning of more to come!

NOTE: This roundup mainly includes the media coverage piece of my marketing & promotion campaign….there were other things that I’ve done which are too numerous to name right now…but I will say this…I revamped my website (thanks Tess), passed out postcards just about everywhere I went, networked at various events in the city and throughout the nation, posted like a fiend on my Facebook page and on Twitter and more…trust me…been hustling…stay hustling…

Again, I gotta thank God…And I gotta thank R., who has listened to me talk about this EREday since July…He is the mostest!!!

Ain’ gon lie…I’m tired…but…it.don’t.stop…

Any thoughts?

This song is apropos today….dreams.come.true…